Chasing Yesterday
by livyluwho
Summary: Angelina left England and everything in it. Going back, was not in her plan. So what happens when her old life comes back to her, can you ever really go back? AJx3FW POST HOG written as if HP deathly hallows doesn't exist. R&R pleaseee.
1. Story of a Girl

_Sometimes I wonder if anything's absolute anymore. Is there still right and wrong? Good and bad? Truth and lies? Or is everything negotiable, left to interpretation, grey. Sometimes we're forced to bend the truth, transform it, cause we're faced with things that are not of our own making. And sometimes things simply catch up to us. – _**One Tree Hill**

_Chasing Yesterday_

Growing up is a funny thing. There's no real line between childhood and having to pay for your own groceries. You just wake up one day and suddenly those clothes you used to play dress up with, actually fit. The world isn't a black and white version of every fairy tale you've ever heard any more, it's the real world out there; with jobs and rent and all the other fun things that come with adulthood. So I go to work, and pay the rent, but is there really a difference between what I am now and what I was then? Sure the clothes fit, but I still eat ice cream out of the carton and sing in the shower and laugh when it's not funny. So take the clothes and the rent and the job away and all you've got is a 23 year old girl with her mom's lipstick smeared all over her face in wobbly high heeled shoes pretending to be grown up.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I rolled lazily and reluctantly out of bed and lay in the pool of sunlight that shone in from my flat window. I basked in the sun for a moment before I pulled myself to my feet and glanced at the clock that hung every so Confidently on my wall across from my bed so I wouldn't have to be bothered To turn my head whilst I was lying in bed to check the time. My eyes Widened with sudden panic and there was a push in my step as I scavenged through piles of strategically placed clothing. I pulled out a casual pink dress and slipped it on frantically brushing away a few wrinkles. I slipped on a pair of white flats and flew out of my flat door. I tumbled down the steps only stopping at room number 206. I opened the door and poked my head it.

"Hunter, get your lazy arse out of bed!"

I saw his slumping figure stir from the couch in the center of the room and with a satisfied shake of my head closed the door. I practically sprinted the four blocks down until I reached a stingy looking building right next to a coffee shop. The bell jingled as I slid through the door. The room was packed with people scribbling on parchment or typing furiously away at enchanted type writers. I slid into my desk and propped my feet up on my desk. I gave a satisfactory smile as I glanced at the time. 10:29, right on schedule. I lazily conjured up a mug and a tea kettle, mornings never sat well with me with out a cup of tea. I watched an angry looking, 30 something man burst out of an office. He stormed over to the door and then scanned the room with narrowed eyes. When his gaze met mine he seemed to have found what he was looking for. I smiled warmly, pouring my tea into the cup.

"Good morning Brian." I cheerfully greeted. Leaning back in my chair once again mug securely in my hand. He ran his fingers through his hair and glared at me.

"I'm warning you Angelina, you keep cutting it this close and -"

"It's my job on the line, not yours" I recited in a painstakingly drawn out tone, I've been getting this speech ever since the day we met at a Woollongong Warriors try out. That was over a year and a half ago now, I had long since abandoned my Quidditch dreams, and weeks of training try out after try out only to end up back where I started. He was doing a report on the team during my try out; I sat down next to him with rejection written all over me. We did some talking and the next thing you know here I am, typing away for the Daily Prophet _Australian_, who would've thought? It doesn't exactly fit the dream, but a girls gotta work eh? Besides I never was suited for the strenuous athletic part of Quidditch, yes I much prefer my 10:30 to 3:00 day spent lounging around my desk pretending to write to running drill after drill starting at six in the morning.

"I know I know, relax, I wasn't late was I?"

"Not today you weren't" He mumbled grumpily "You're interviewing Oliver Wood today so get a move on it. You've got to be at the pitch by 11:00 sharp."

I went into sudden panic and my eyes widened with new fear. I slammed my tea onto my desk and hastily chased the middle aged man's retreating figure. I burst into his office and marched over to his desk.

Brian spun in his chair and fixed me with a slightly irritated expression.

"I can't interview Oliver Wood," I said pulling my hair onto my right shoulder and running my fingers through it furiously "Can I trade with Ruby?" I pleaded.

He narrowed his eyes and tilted his head.

"Your telling me you'd take the 'Best Beaches' article over and Oliver Wood interview?"

I nodded my head letting my hands fall to my side. Brian shook his head in disbelief muttering something to himself.

"You're mad Johnson." He responded turning back towards the pile of papers on his desk.

"Indeed I am," I responded through a grateful smile. I backed out of the office and skipped over to the far corner of the building. A thin brunette sat at her desk proof reading an article. She twisted the multiple rings around he fingers and bit her lip in concentration. I smiled and slid onto her desk swinging my legs back an forth.

"Guess who's interviewing Oliver Wood today?"

She broke her focus and gazed up at me with a mixture of admiration and jealousy.

"How the hell did you land that?" She asked letting her pen drop to the table. I picked it up and tapped it lightly on my knuckles before shrugging.

"I never said it was me," I replied

"Who then?"

"You." I stated casually looking back down at the pencil. I looked back up to see her blue eyes swell with excitement.

"Who's doing beaches then?" She asked to make sure this wouldn't all fall apart on her.

"I am, we're trading." I answered standing up from the desk. She gladly handed me the information and I wandered back over to my desk and my tea which was now slightly cold.

I spent about two hours completing the beach article, it didn't take long as Ruby had already done the bulk of the work. But I put the finishing touches on it and called it a day.

I grabbed my small pile of papers and dropped them onto Brian's desk.

"I'm heading out, drinks tonight?" I asked pausing in the door for a moment before departing.

"Can't, Mary is making me go to dinner tonight. Some sort of formal thing, she's forcing me into a suit and everything." He grumbled shoving my pile of papers into a large folder.

"Alright, I suppose I'll see you tomorrow then!"

I stepped out into the warm air breathing a sigh of relief, I'm just lucky any girl in her right mind would kill for a Wood interview.

I strolled back to my apartment building and walked into flat 206. I settled down on the couch.

"Why the hell are you home so early?" A voice called out from the adjacent kitchen.

"Had a short assignment, Brian let me leave." I replied picking up the half eaten bag of gummy worms that were lying on the table in front of me and began picking away at t green ones. Hunter emerged from the kitchen looking as if he'd just rolled out of bed.

"Did you skip work again today?"

He smiled guiltily and ran a hand through his hair.

"Let's just say I'm going to be skipping work everyday for a little while."

"Please tell me you didn't get fired." I replied sighing. This would mean dinner at my place every night until he was able to afford it again.

"When's dinner tonight?" he asked sitting down next to me and flipping through an open magazine.

"Dunno, I haven't even had lunch yet." I responded knowing I would need to start asking around for job openings or I'd lose all sanity, living with Hunter is enough to send you to a St. Mungos for the rest of eternity.

"Want to go out for lunch? Your treat." He cheekily suggested. I grinned and slapped his arm playfully.

"Why not, let me just go grab us some money." I rose from the couch and walked up the flight of stairs to my flat. I walked in to find someone standing with their back towards me looking out the bay window and over the harbour. I didn't recognize the blond figure so I grabbed my wand off of my counter and waited for her to acknowledge my presence.

In a moments time I would be wishing I couldn't recognize the figure, but I did.

"Angelina Johnson, where the hell have you been?"


	2. Katie All Over

A/N: okkkay. So this chapter is a bit choppy, it jumps a lot, and its some what awkward, but I'm just trying to get things started here so give me a breakkk. Haha. Any way here's chapter two!

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not mine.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Everything I'd spent the past three and a half years avoiding was standing in the middle of my apartment and I did not like it one bit. I began to feel a bit dizzy, it was the sensation one gets when you open an old storage closet. It's filled with all the things you don't want, everything you've locked away, and you have the overwhelming feeling that everything will just come pouring out at any second. And so was the sensation as Katie Bell stood in my flat not knowing that she, in essence, was the reason for the boxes and Hunter who lives downstairs and my job at the Prophet and the Sydney Harbour, the reason I grew up.

I did not have the slightest idea how to respond to her question. 'Where the hell have you been' is a hard question to answer when you've got about two years of excuses to choose from. I ignored the question as she seemed to have dismissed it. She was looking curiously around the flat as she had been when I first entered.

"How'd you find me?" Was the only thing that came to mind. It was a logical question, really. I cut off all contact with everybody I left behind in England, that chapter was closed, done with, and yet here she was trying to pry open the book again.

"Wood mentioned your name, said you'd been working down here. It was the first any of us had heard in years so I did my research. Wasn't that hard to find you once I was here, asked around, everyone seemed to know you." She responded casually. Her blue eyes drilled into mine with a driving curiosity. I found my eyes searching frantically around the room for some sort of diversion. What do you say after two years of silence? What does this girl expect? We were 18 then, and at the time we felt high and mighty, out of the reach of misfortune, we were in a sense invincible. But things happen, people change.

"I meant to come back you know," I began setting down the papers I'd brought from work. "But life just sort of…intervened. I always figured I'd go back soon. Soon turned to days and days turned to months, and after a while it was just too far out of reach."

"Why did you go in the first place?" She asked. Her eyes sought for answers that I'm not sure I can give her. There's no real reason I left, it was just everything in my life at the time, it seems trivial now, but I suppose it was just a whole bunch of change in not a lot of time. I got too comfortable I knew nothing but the warmth of my comforter and Fred Weasley.

Then, Fred left Hogwarts and all of a sudden, life wasn't one huge prank any more the blankets had been pulled from me. Fred Weasley, the boy I thought would never reach adulthood, grew up, and to be honest, that scared the living daylights out of me. Reality was tugging at our feet, we weren't just a guy and a girl trying to make it work any more, suddenly we were a man and a woman and the world was expecting something of us.

Katie had Healer school, Alicia had her brains, Lee was already announcing Quidditch matches, and the Twins lived above their extremely successful joke shop. And where was I?

I suppose the thing that set me off was when it was halfway through our summer after graduation. We were all lounging around the twin's flat as was the usual. Fred and I were bickering about something insignificant, but for some reason neither of us could let it go. Suddenly we were all fighting, it was total chaos, but in a while, we all resolved it and moved on. The next week a similar thing happened, only this time, everyone was fighting against me. To put it simply, I got scared. Everything was changing and I didn't know what to do so I ran. I ran as far away as I possibly could and I found this life, and to be honest, I've got no complaints.

These boxes on the floor, they haven't been moved much since the day I moved in, and that refrigerator over there has never been filled with anything but shoes because that is just the way it is.

You know?

Here, I feel like I can control things, not much change goes on in my day to day life. Not that I hole myself up in my apartment, I get out in the world, but when I first moved here, I was the _British _girl, yet people didn't question that. Hunter was the first person I met; he didn't drill me with questions on why I was here, or who I was, or what the hell I was thinking, he just accepted it.

Everyone who I've met since living here, I've formed this strange sort of bond with, we trust each other, but we don't get too involved. It's stable. Back in London, I know that this would not be true. I'm so out of control when I'm with Katie, and Alicia, we go almost too deep. When you put yourself so much into another person, you risk a lot of involvement, and **a lot of change. **Because what changes for one, changes for all when you live in a relationship like that. 

Some days I think I should go back, but I'm too far gone now, to go back would to be caught in between two worlds. You can't just sink back into the life you abandoned, because it's not going to be right where you left it.

I glanced up at Katie and shrugged.

"Change of scenery I suppose,"

She nodded slowly knowing it was some sort of false pretense. She strolled back over to the window before glancing around the flat. Her eyes lingered on the several boxes that littered the floor before looking back up at me.

"So, new apartment?" She asked grasping at conversation.

"Not exactly," I replied softly "Few years."

She smiled to herself opening her mouth to say something before closing it again.

"Now I don't mean to sound rude or anything, but what are you doing here?" It came out ruder than I mean it, I was really just curious. What the hell was Katie Bell doing here after almost 4 years? If she was under the impression that I would pack my things and scurry off back to England with her that she was sorely mistaken.

"I just wanted to see you," She began "I guess part of me was hoping that maybe you'd…" She knew it was a long shot as she let her voice trail off.

"I really can't. I mean, aside from the fact that I've got my job, and people here, things are different, I'm sure you guys aren't all still the same as when I left. It's not Hogwarts anymore Katie." I mentally scolded myself for letting that come out so harshly. But what was she expecting?

"Yeah…well you'd be surprised." She laughed tugging on the bottom of her white skirt. "I figured you'd say that." She added as her laugh faded to disappointment. Silence hung awkwardly in the air, I wasn't sure what to say, what should I say?

"Well," _Don't do it Angie, it's a lot of trouble, _I thought to myself before extending my voice. "You could say here for a while I suppose." I choked out. _I told you not to do it. _But really, its all I could think to do. Her face lit up and she smiled brightly at me.

"Brilliant!" She said plopping down on the couch as if now that she'd had an invite the flat was hers for the taking. I couldn't help my lips curling upwards. Katie Bell sure hasn't changed…

"There are a few things you should know about living here, firstly is-"

"OI ANGIE! ARE YOU BLOODY TAKING A SHIT OR SOMETHING?" Hunter yelled reminding me of the reason I came up here any way.

"Hunter." I finished, grimacing as he shouted up the stairs. Katie shot me a confused look and I sighed.

"He lives downstairs and he pretty much bums off of me because he's to damn lazy to keep a job." I explained. Katie crinkled her nose and did not look all that excited by the thought of him.

"But, he's a good friend and he's a great guy so I put up with him most of the time." I responded. "We were actually just going out to lunch, so care to join us?" I asked walking over to the fridge and grabbing a wad of money and stuffing it into the small pocket on my dress.

"Sure," She responded standing up from her position on the couch.

"Angelina what in the name of-" Hunter entered the room pausing when he noticed Katie. She studied his lanky figure and messy sandy hair before greeting him

"Hi I'm Katie,"

Hunter grinned and laughed yelling to me.

"Oi Angie, you've brought another Brit over have you?"

"Hunter, this is Katie Bell. She's…an old friend."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lunch was surprisingly pleasant. The conversation was easy and Hunter only hit on Katie once, and this was easily resolved as I asked about how Lee was. After we had finished, Hunter said he was heading over to the _Prophet_ to see if he could get Brian out of his dinner thing. Katie and I headed out to the Harbour. We strolled casually along until we reached the large flower park; it has some sort of legitimate name that always escapes my memory. I sat cross legged on a bench, while Katie leaned out over the harbour.

"It's easy to forget things out here." She commented closing her eyes and letting the warm breeze take over her skin.

"So how is everybody?" The question had dug its self out of the back of my mind and was now out in the open air. Katie turned towards me leaning against the railing.

"I thought you'd never ask," She chuckled. "Alicia has some sort of job at the Ministry, none of us are really sure what she does, only that she complains about it every second of the day. She and George had a bit of a falling out, I'd say about one year ago. Lee's doing Quidditch announcing in London, and the shop is doing particularly well. George is seeing some Spanish girl, she's quite exotic."

"Is Alicia furious?" I questioned.

"Oh yes," Katie replied grinning. I sighed, thinking about the only person she hadn't mentioned.

"And Fred?" I asked my eyebrows rose with intent. She diverted her gaze from my eyes and scanned a nearby pink flowering bush.

"Yeah, he's good." She said forcing a sad smile and turning back towards the water.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As the sun went down along the horizon we walked out of my apartment building and I lead Katie towards the docks.

"Two tickets for the Manly Beach ferry." I said handing the man the money and grabbing the tickets.

"Where are we going?" Katie questioned letting her short blond hair hang down by her shoulders. I tugged at my light jumper and pulled her along with me.

"You'll see." I said grinning. I found the ferry and lead her to the back of it. We were the only people to brave the windy conditions outside as the rest of the occupants took comfort in the padded seats and coffee that were offered inside.

The sky grew darker as we pulled out of the harbour and began streaming along to an opposite beach.

"When I first got here, before I really knew any one, I used to ride on this every night. I hardly ever got off at the beach, it was just a sort of escape to simply sit and throw my thoughts to the wind."

I explained as she leaned back on the bench. We talked vaguely until we reached the beach and we moved to the front of the boat.

"Now, I never really thought Sydney to be all that great of a city, I mean we had London right?" I began as the boat took off again, "That was until I saw Sydney at night." I replied grinning. I nodded towards the vision in front of her. Her eyes reflected the glow of the city. The opera house was lit up as was the bridge and the lights off the buildings lay shimmering in the water below us.

"Well, that is certainly something." She breathed soaking in the view. I nodded my head slowly along with her.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once back in the flat I pulled the mattress I had stuffed away out of my closet and lay it on the floor next to my bed.

"That should do," I mumbled to myself. I slipped out of my dress tossing it to the floor and grabbed a pair of shorts and a blue hooded jumper. Spring nights can get a bit chilly. Katie emerged from the bathroom in a t-shirt and trackies.

"You know, it's unlucky you don't have me for a roommate any more. I used to keep all your shit so clean!" She joked tossing her clothes on the floor right along side the rest of my clothes.

"Hey, this may be a mess, but I know exactly where everything is." I defended as I clumped my light brown hair into a messy bun. Katie eyed me suspiciously and I rolled my eyes.

I strolled into the kitchen and poured myself a bowl of cheerios; Katie eyed mine hungrily so I poured her a bowl as well.

"Could you grab some milk from the fridge?" I asked searching hopelessly for two somewhat clean spoons.

"Sure," she said opening up the fridge. Her eye brows furrowed in utter confusion "Let me get this straight," She said, "You keep your shoes in the fridge?" She asked placing the milk on the counter next to me.

"And the milk, **and **some chocolate cake!" I pointed out shaking the carton in my hand.

"I dunno how long I can stay with you! It's bad for my health I reckon…" she joked grabbing her bowl. I shot her a mock glare and settled onto the couch with Katie Bell right next to me.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

PLEASE REVEIWWWWW : ) feed back would be most appreciated.


	3. Just Another Scene

A/N: Alright, that was an amazingly quick update if I do say so myself! Mostly because I really wanted to get the rest of these _intro _chapters out of the way. Now our story I kicking off I hope! I still fell that it is a bit jumpy, but I'm trying to work out the kinks, any feedback, criticism, praise, hate, would be amazing : ).

Disclaimer: I'm not jo yooooooooooo.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sure Katie and I shared a lot of similarities, especially when we were back in Hogwarts, but I always knew there were a few things that distinctly separated the two of us. Always those couple of things that you would find yourself frustrated with every once and a while.

Point being, **she is a bloody morning person. **It wasn't even like she was the sort of chirpy, motherly, _Honey I made breakfast_, type of morning person. She was more the, I'm awake so you should be too kind of early bird.

"Angelina! Get your arse out of bed! Its 9:30!" She barked yanking my covers from me. I groaned and rolled into the half of my bed that lay in sunlight and buried my head in my pillow.

"Is that all?" I mumbled letting my heavy eyelids close and take me back to sleep.

"Get up you lazy wanker." She concluded attempting to drag me off of the bed. I held a firm grasp to the sides of my bed frame and she pulled at my shoulders.

"But you forced me get up at nine yesterday, I reserve the right to sleep an extra half an hour today."

"We've got to be at work by 10:30. Merlin knows how you make it on your own…" She muttered walking out of the room and towards the kitchen. My body was immediately jerked wide awake. _We? _As in Katie? Coming to work with me? This would be her fourth day here, and things were back to the way they had been in Hogwarts, but I wasn't sure I wanted her in this life. I would kind of like to keep 'this_ life' _so to speak **my zone.** Sure I introduced her to Hunter, but he hardly counts for anything in this society, and I showed her the ins and outs of the city, but that was as far as I went and as far as I wanted to go.

"You're coming to work with me?" I repeated skeptically leaning up against the bed post.

"Yeah, I go bored yesterday after Hunter left me and he's got that job interview that you set up for him this afternoon, so I figured I'd tag along, see what this whole writing business was about."

I gulped. It wasn't like I could just tell her she wasn't allowed. First of all I'm not her mother, who am I to say _That is against the rules, _and second of all a whole bunch of whys would follow and I'm really in no mood for whys at 9:30 in the morning. It just seemed like she was getting very involved here, if she got too attached she might expect me to become attached as well and return with her…but that simply is not happening.

_Told you not to let her stay, not to let her get involved._ A voice inside my head scolded me but I shook the thought and rolled off the bed.

"Alright, let me just get dressed…"

About fifteen minutes later we found ourselves standing outside the old familiar door the read _The Prophet. _A few of the letters had scratched off over the years and you had to turn the handle the opposite way of what was usual for a door, the blinds that hung over the window of the door were bent and tattered, this was no spiff and spam new building.

I forced a smile as I lead her into the crowded room and over to my desk. I motioned to my chair and she willingly sat down.

"I'll be right back," I said before strolling over to Brian's office. I slid in through the door and the man nearly bit my head off.

"What the hell do you-" He paused as he realized who was standing in his office, at quarter to ten in the morning. "Johnson?" He questioned in disbelief rubbing the back of his head and ruffling his fading brown hair.

"The one and only,"

"Is there some sort of nuclear war going on that we don't know about?" He asked glancing out the window in befuddlement. I narrowed my eyes and shot him a curious look.

"It would take a nuclear war **at least** to bring Angelina Johnson to my office any earlier that 10:20 in the morning." He muttered sarcastically. I glared at him but then shrugged as it was true, it would take a nuclear war…or Katie Bell.

"Well I suppose that is part of the reason I need to talk to you. You see, this girl from back in England showed up in my apartment and I couldn't just send her out on the street so I opened my warm, gracious heart to her."

Brian rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah get on with it you sadist." I smiled and continued with my tale.

"She suggested that she come to work with me and I let her talk me into it and…" I trailed off.

"You don't want to be stuck with her the whole day, and you want me to take her off your hands for you is that it?" He finished. I nodded and smiled hopefully knowing that **it would take a nuclear war** for Brian to ever agree to a thing like that, but hey it was worth a shot.

"How many years have you been working here for Johnson?" He questioned his eyes dancing with amusement as he leaned back in his swiveling chair and smiled at me.

"Enough to know that I should be using my extra time now so that I can get off at say…1:30?" I supplied. He looked at me skeptically.

"Angelina you got here forty-five minutes early that does not give you license to leave an hour and a half earlier." He barked.

"But the fact that you like me more than you'll admit gives me license to leave when ever I want."

"Get the hell out of my office Johnson! Get back to your damn work!" He yelled pointing me towards the door. I smirked as I detected a hint of a smile underneath his bitter frown.

Well mission wasn't exactly accomplished per say, but I'd be leaving early today. I made my way back to my desk and conjured another chair and two cups of tea. I propped my feet up on my desk and leaned back in my chair with my mug in one hand and the articles I was meant to be editing in the other. I could feel Katie's grin as she watched my eyes flow over the words, surely I was missing mountains of comma splices and infinite number of cases but I couldn't be bothered digging deeper than the obvious mistakes.

"Yes?" I asked upon Katie's relentless gaze. She laughed to herself and responded.

"Sorry, I just can't believe you are actually a writer, I mean who would have thought…"

"Believe me, I'm no writer." I scoffed flipping the page.

"Oh yes you are, take a look around!" She said gesturing to the many type writers and quills that were furiously at work all over the room. "What would you call all this then?"

I sighed and handed her a stack of papers. "I call this paying the bills."

At one forty-five I emerged from Brian's office feeling free as a bird. Work had been a synch, having Katie here was not the burden I had expected. In fact with her help I got through everything that I needed to do, and she was one hell of an editor, she was catching mistakes that get past Brian's eye when he does the final read through. After arranging drinks tonight with Brian, Hunter, Ruby and Jack, I headed back towards Katie and we promptly exited the office.

"You were brilliant!" I exclaimed as we strolled along the street. She smiled modestly and tied her hair back.

"Seriously, I've got a plan. You'll come with me for drinks tonight and by tomorrow morning you'll have my job! Brian loved you!" I squealed stuffing my hands into the pockets of my worn in jean capris. Katie threw me a sad smile and sighed.

"I've got to go home tonight or very early tomorrow morning at the least."

My face dropped with the realization that Katie wasn't here to stay, just a passer by. I frowned and opened my mouth but she cut me off

"I've got to be back, I promised Alicia I'd be back for her big interview, and she's up for a pretty high position in the Ministry." Katie explained.

I bit my lip, not even knowing why I was feeling so sad to see her go. I mean I have people here; it wasn't like I needed her or anything. It's just that I suppose it's easier to go with out something when you've almost completely forgotten about it, but when Katie came here I started remembering.

Part of me thought it was good that she was leaving, it makes things less complicated. But the other part knew that I would miss her like hell despite the fact that we'd spent but a mere 4 days together and I hadn't always been so open to her presence. It only took us about two days to fall back into place with one another, which after 3 years isn't too bad at all.

"You can't stay any longer?" I pleaded meeting her eyes hesitantly. She smiled pointedly at me.

"You know how Alicia is."

I couldn't help but smile. Breaking an engagement with Alicia is like breaking an engagement with the devil. You might as well be dead on the spot.

"You could come back with me. Only for a little while that is- I mean, unless you want to…"

I took her words into consideration for a moment before shaking my head. No way, going back to England would mean trouble. I don't belong there any more; I'd be a sorry third wheel. Besides Katie alone evoked enough memories, imagine what the whole lot of them would do.

"Honestly I can't." I concluded. She nodded in silent understanding and we finished the two more blocks to my flat in complete silence.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I walked into the dimly lit pub and Hunter waved me towards their table. The bar was filled with witches and wizards alike drinking away what ever problems lay outside the doors to this room. I knew this because I recognized most of them simply from seeing the same faces night after night, the drinking never seems to help the problems much either, just aggravates them I reckon because they always seem to come back. There was a band on the stage, probably some local mates desperate for a gig, but the music wasn't bad.

"Hey Angelina," Ruby greeted taking a sip of her very large mug of fire whiskey. Ruby was a drinker, the kind who thinks it will solve all of their problems. Brian, he was the kind of guy who almost always had a drink in his hand, but never seemed to be fully intoxicated. Hunter, well Hunter just has some control issues; I usually stop him when he sends for a 4th round. I drank, but it never really seemed to do anything for me. Granted I've had a few wild nights, I'm not in any way addicted, nor do I see it as any sort of escape, it's the social aspect that I relate to I suppose.

"Where's blondie?" Brian asked desperately. "She was bloody amazing today! Like to have ten of her on my staff,"

I smiled, "Left about an hour ago. She had…business back in England." I replied letting my thoughts wonder what was going on in England right now.

"Why did you leave there Angie?" Ruby posed her question somewhat tentatively. Hunter and Brian looked at me with equal curiosity as none of them new the answer.

"Change of scenery." I said shrugging. Might as well stick to the same excuse, if I'm going to be vague I may as well be consistent.

"She needs another drink I reckon." Hunter said grinning. I smiled sipping the glass that was still full in front of me.

"So what was with that dinner thing the other night?" I asked Brian teasingly knowing he would proceed on some sort of 'Mary' rant.

"Mary that damned woman-"

"Brian my man, you are so whipped." Hunter said throwing it in his face. Brian frowned and Ruby hit Hunter upside the head.

"He's bloody married you dolt, being whipped is like part of your marital vows."

"Mary," Brian began. Mary was Brian's wife as you may (or may not) have already realized. None of us had ever met her and there was only one reason for it, none of us wanted to meet her. She was just so controlling and nagging; Brian could supply us with an endless number of complaints. See Mary is part of the whole reason we even started doing this whole _drinks _thing after work most days. We were Brian's outlet, this was his free time because the minute he strolled through his apartment door all hell would be let loose. And yet aside from all that, he still loves her.

They have one of the most dysfunctional relationships I've ever witnessed, and yet they still have the romance of it all. That was always the part that amazed me.

I went in and out of the current conversation as finished my first drink and half of my second. Hunter was nearing his 5th so I pulled us out and dragged him back to our apartment building.

After dumping Hunter on his couch I walked up to my flat. I glanced at the clock; it was just after eleven thirty. I then headed for the kitchen; I felt the strong urge to devour the chocolate cake which was sitting in my refrigerator begging to be eaten. I grabbed a fork and dug in as I settled myself on the couch and flipped on the muggle TV I had situated right in front of it.

After watching about ten _I Love Lucy _reruns I set the cake down on the counter and wandered drowsily into my room. I cuddled into my bed not bothering to change out of the jeans and t-shirt I was still wearing and fell sound asleep.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saturday morning rewarded me with a wonderful sleep in. In fact if it hadn't been for the noise coming from outside my open window, I might never have woken. I slipped out of bed and began scavenging the room for something to throw on. I slipped into a pair of black shorts and picked a grey top off the floor. I quickly turned it inside and out and was halfway into throwing it over my head when I realized something, it wasn't mine.

_Must be Katie's _I reasoned holding it out for examination. A glance at the designer label meant it was definitely hers. Under any other circumstance I would have kept the shirt, never given it a second thought, but I had the strangest drive to return it to her. Perhaps my morals have finally decided to make a case for themselves and speak up.

I brought it into the kitchen and wrapped it with brown paper. I was about to head out the door to go to the owlery down the street when a thought struck me.

Wouldn't it be a nice gesture if I returned it to her myself? I paused at the door thinking about this. I shook the thought from my head deciding it would be a lot of work for a little shirt any way and headed down the street.

By the time I had reached the owlery I had decided for some reason beyond my conscious that I would indeed return it to her in person.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I didn't give myself enough time to second guess my decision, within a few minutes of being home I had apparated over to Katie Bells flat in London, England.

I glanced around the apartment, I was just as I remembered. I was standing in the middle of a large open room with a couch and coffee table, the kitchen was open and just across the room. To my left was a bedroom with a full bed, Alicia's room, and to my right was a bed room and bathroom with two twin beds. Katie's room which we had shared a very long time ago. I found myself lost in a series of nostalgic snap shots as I recalled the old flat.

I pulled myself reluctantly out of this day dream state and into reality. I took a quick look around the apartment, no one was home. But 11:30 on a Saturday night who would be. I shrugged off my disappointment and began looking around for some parchment; I'll at least scribble a brief note along with the shirt.

I was bent over the desk rummaging through its drawers in search of some parchment when someone walked through the door. I spun around immediately, hoping it would be Katie. I felt the color drain from my face as I realized how very far from Katie this person was.

"Oi Katie, are you-"

His voice stopped abruptly as he entered the room and I entered into his full vision.

All of my rationalization snapped and my body was frozen as my mind flew a mile a minute.

He opened his mouth to say something but I did not want to hear what he had to say, this was one reality I did no want to face. With a crack I was back in the comfort of my Sydney flat and I didn't plan on leaving it for a while yet.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

three guesses who the mystery person was. Haha, wow I'm really subtle in my foreshadowing.

Hate it? Liked it? Loved it? REALLY hated it? What ever you thought tell me via review! X3 thanks for reading!


	4. Do You Feel

A/N: OKAY, BIG HUGE THANKS thanks to Jaynie, 000kayko000, Skyre, Silver Scribes, Chrys-Moony-Marauder, xxvisionaryxx for reviewing chapter three! Reviews really are helpful as it tells me what people like, what is confusing, what they don't like, and it makes me write more when I get reviews!

Disclaimer: I'm a rotten liar so here is the truth… I am J.K. Rowling undercover.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was in a very strange state of emotions as I lay curled up in my bed. I snuggled the covers up to my chin despite the warm breeze and plentiful light that was coming from my window.

Clearly London is some sort of bad luck charm for me, because I had only been in the country a matter of seconds before running into Fred Weasley. The one person in the whole country who I wanted to avoid, and he was the one who showed up for my 15 seconds of glory.

Fred was the person who perhaps took the most forgetting when I moved here. See, at the end of Hogwarts we were very much together, it was an official; I'm your girlfriend kind of thing. But upon graduating and being thrust into the real world, we faded from our **FrAngelina**love struck puppies stage and fell into an odd sort of attraction. We weren't, together per say, but we weren't broken up either and it wasn't like either of us was seeing other people simply because, neither of us wanted to see anybody else.

But towards the end, things weren't going so smoothly. It wasn't so easy to be together any more; it felt like we had to work for it and on days when neither of us felt like trying, we bickered. It was a countless number of insignificant battles, little defeats.

I had to go against every inch of my will to erase what ever might have been left of him. Every thought I had every had I shoved away until all that was left of Fred Weasley was a small corner in the depths of my subconscious filled with bad goodbyes and faded snap shots.

And then I impulsively return to England to return **a****shirt**to a person that I saw for the first time in almost for years a few days ago, and Fred Weasley has t make an appearance.

I didn't even look at him long enough to process if there was anything different about him. All it took was one glance and I had gone absolutely insane, just one moment to make my stomach do about 10 cartwheels.

Seeing Fred Weasley scared me for a number of reasons. First of all, I wouldn't know what to say to him if Merlin himself was feeding the words into my mouth. It scares me that even after months with out seeing him; he still has so much control over me. But most of all, I'm scared out of my wits that I'm not as over him as I've been pretending to be.

There is a large gap you know between getting over someone, and **moving on**I forgot about him, erased him, pushed him from my mind and I moved on. I pushed the thought of him away so quickly that I never gave my time to get over him. But then again, seeing him again was not in the game plan.

But at the same time that I'm feeling scared to death, something about seeing him again drew me in, made me want more. Curiosity begged me to return and see what would happen. My life in Sydney is very safe. Like I've said before, I've got no complaints, yet something uncontrollable inside of me longed for more.

It was a battle between my rational logic and an exciting sort of twisting in my stomach. My rational side won out as another thought wandered into my mind.

What the hell was he doing in Katie Bell's apartment?

Looking for Katie Bell. Though I didn't want to believe that Katie would do such a thing it seemed to be the only logical explanation. Besides I'd only been with her for four days, and it wasn't as if we were thick as thieves like we once were. And after my being gone for so long, it would hardly be betrayal…it just didn't sit right with me, but it all made sense. She rarely mentioned Lee, and spoke not but two breaths about Fred. Everything seemed to point in that direction.

I sighed self-pityingly and threw off my comforter deciding I needed to have a chat with Hunter about all this considering he will be waking up in a few minutes. I noted glancing at the mid day sun.

I scurried down the stairs and burst into Hunter's apartment and burst through the door. He was standing in the middle of the room conversing lightly with some girl. I rolled my eyes, Hunter always thought of himself as quite the charmer.

"Hunter! I've got to-" My thought was cut off as the girl turned around throwing me an apologetic smile.

"Bloody hell!" I shouted in surprise at seeing Katie Bell standing next to him. I glared at her, not about to greet her return with open arms considering the circumstances.

"Hunter! What is she doing here?" I seethed under my breath thought it was quite audible to both parties. He merely glanced at Katie and shrugged.

"If you want the shirt back that badly, I'll run upstairs and get it for you, no problem really, you didn't have to come all the way-"

Katie shook her head and crinkled her nose in confusion. I sighed and decided this conversation was better suited for the privacy of my flat.

"Come on," I murmured to Katie grabbing her hand and leading her up to my flat.

"CARE TO LET ME IN ON ALL OF THIS?" Hunter shouted helplessly from the floor below. I leaned over the staircase and glared at him and followed Katie into my flat.

"So let me get this straight, you show up - uninvited I might add - after four years stay for a few days, then leave. Then you show up - uninvited - **again. **Care to enlighten me?"

"Only if you tell me what happened between you and Fred last night?" She countered with a slight smile.

"So you heard about that eh?" I asked softly, abandoning my harsh demeanor.

"Well, Alicia said came back to the party mumbling something about **Angelina** and **London**, I did the guess work,"

"Well, I wouldn't have even seen the ruddy git if he hadn't been in **your **apartment." I said accusingly. Katie's eyes widened with the realization of what I was implying. "I can do guess work too you know,"

"Okay, that is really entirely wrong." She stuttered moving a hand through her blond hair anxiously.

"Is it?"

She looked at me pleadingly before sighing, "Look, **Lee** and I are very much together." I eyed her skeptically so she continued, "You know that job interview Alicia had? Well, she got the job, so last night we were all at George's flat celebrating. Any way, I left at around 10:30 to go meet Lee..." I quirked an eyebrow at this and she blushed continuing her story "So apparently Alicia had way too much to drink and was a bit loopy, so she started yelling for me. Nobody could get her to shut up, so Fred goes to my flat to get me, sees you, and well you know the rest." She finished as I nodded my head. I lowered my suspicious glare though I wasn't completely convinced of what she just told me being true.

"Well, Fred and I saw each other for a span of approximately 15 seconds and then I bolted," I said, "It really wasn't anything to hear about, just a few seconds under fire, that's it."

"What were you even doing there?" She asked earnestly and I shrugged. Returning her shirt had been my proxy, but I think I went there wanting something like that to happen. Something in my subconscious was begging for confrontation.

"I needed to return your shirt."

She nodded vaguely and now it was my turn to ask her,

"So why did you come back here? Decided to take Brian up on his job offer?"

She bit her lip and stood up from her comfortable position on the couch. She met my gaze uncertainly.

"You should come back," She said though it was barely audible. I conjured a mug of tea and let it rest against my bottom lip. I should have shot it down instantaneously, but something was holding me back.

"It would be a mess." I concluded. She shook her head,

"You've got to come back," She pleaded, "You can't just pretend we never existed."

"Yes I can actually;" I shot back "I was doing just fine until you showed up!"

"Which says a whole lot!" Katie shouted. I shifted my gaze down to the steaming tea in my mug. "Look, you've got to come back, just say hi to everyone, stay a few days, that's all I'm asking."

"It's not as simple as you make it seem," I explained "Going back…well it complicates things. Besides, I don't think Fred was all that thrilled to see me." I added sipping my tea and nearly drowning in my self -pity.

"Angelina, he was just surprised, you are the one who apparated across the world at the very sight of him!"

I smiled weakly and set my cup down on the counter.

"You are coming back with me Angelina Johnson," Katie stated firmly. I grinned at her and shook my head.

"I'd really rather be in face to face combat with Lord Voldemort," Well, maybe that wasn't completely true…

"Well, it's a lucky thing you're a brave girl then," Before I knew what was happening she had grasped firmly onto my arm and with a snap we were alongside apparating. A million swears zigzagged through my mind as we landed in the center of the flat which I had been running from just a few hours ago.

The room was dark and the streets outside were quiet.

"What the hell?" I shouted. She quickly clapped a hand over my mouth and shushed me.

"Its nearly three in the morning, do you want to wake Alicia? I'm sure that's really how you'd like to greet her after all these years," She muttered sarcastically stumbling towards her room. I wrenched my wrist from her grasp and glared at her.

"Actually I wasn't planning on greeting her at all, and my mind is certainly not swayed any by this little escapade."

"Look you are already here, you can't just leave-" Katie said her eyes brimming with disappointment. I shook my head and before I knew it I was back in my apartment. I slid down the steps and dragged Hunter off of his couch leading him outside.

"We need to go out," I mumbled.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After wasting away the rest of my Saturday lounging about the Opera House steps with Hunter, I took to my couch for that night and much of the next day. Monday morning I trudged into work 15 minutes late. I paused at the door trying to think of a liable excuse to feed Brian but when none came to my mind I strolled in deciding that he would bite my head off any way, why bother with some elaborate fancy excuse?

Sure enough, I was only a few steps into the crowded building before I found his furious figure looming before me.

"You are late," He shrieked. "I've been lenient Johnson, but really you need to start-"

"I know Brian," I sighed "What do you say you let me get to work?" He started back at me astonished that I was not feeding him the rest of his speech denoted with my own smart ass comments.

I strolled down to my desk and examined the information for the article I was meant to be writing. I read it over casually but all that I got from it was something about Sydney going underwater in ten years and I seriously doubt that that is what the article was meant to be about seeing as the title of the first page I'd read was _Sydney Surfers Hit a Dangerous Beach. _

"Hey Angie," Ruby greeted pulling up a chair and leaning on my desk. I dropped the pile of papers gratefully on my desk.

"Hey, got a good assignment today?" I asked. She rolled her eyes shaking her head.

"Nah, it's got something to do with Aboriginals and all their bloody problems."

I laughed thinking it would at least be good for entertainment. We chatted for a bit before we forced ourselves to read through the painstakingly boring material we'd been given to jumble words up about.

I sat cross legged in my chair and found myself completely unable to concentrate on what was in front of me. I had read over the words, they just didn't seem to stay much longer than that in my mind.

I shook my head and glanced back and forth between the door and the papers on my desk. Finally I got up and strolled over to Brian's office.

"Hey, can I ask you a favor?"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When I popped into the vast living room, Katie was sitting on the couch directly in front of me flipping aimlessly through a magazine. She jerked her head up in alarm and immediately grinned when she saw me standing there. I smiled back and shoved her shirt at her.

"You forgot it again," I joked as she grabbed it from my hands. Someone stirred in the kitchen and I glanced up.

"What is going-" George Weasley's thought was never finished. His mouth nearly hit the busy street below us as he stared at me with disbelief.

"Katie, where the hell did you meet this girl?" He asked her honestly.

"Hello George," I said through a smirk. He smiled back in return, though somewhat tentatively.

"Angelina!" He exclaimed pulling me into a hug. I allowed my arms to grasp his much taller frame and stepped back. Nothing had changed about George, his freckles had faded a bit and his hair was a bit darker, but he was still the same carefree, up to no good George as I remembered.

"I was worried you wouldn't still be able to tell the difference between Fred and me," He said chuckling. I smiled and resisted the urge to hug him again.

It felt surprisingly good, no horrible pit in my stomach, it felt right somehow being back here. I settled down the small bag I'd brought with me and slid onto the couch next to Katie.

"Seriously, where on this Earth have you been? Scavenging Antarctica for glacial fossils I presume?" He teased leaning up against the wall and crossing his legs.

"Didn't Katie tell you?" I asked. He wrinkled his brow in befuddlement and glanced at me. I looked at Katie whose guilty face was once again hidden by the magazine.

"You didn't tell them?" I asked disbelievingly. She darted her eyes back and forth between the two of us.

"She's been living in Sydney." Katie mumbled against the magazine. I smiled and encouraged her to continue, "I went to visit her there, I wasn't visiting Lee's sister-"

"You told them you were visiting Lee's sister?" I cried in outrage. She nodded once again.

"Why didn't you tell us?" George asked, but nodded his head in understanding when Katie gave him a pointed look.

"Care to fill me in?" I asked. George gulped and looked at me with pity.

"What are you all on about?" I interrogated groping for answers.

"OI GEORGE, HELP US WITH THE BOXES!" Fred called from the hall way of the flat. Katie looked at me as if to say _does that answer your question._ I nodded and bit my lip anticipating the moments to come. George hurried over to help Fred and Alicia with the large boxes they were carrying.

"Who is that?" Alicia wondered gazing at the couch. "If that is your little exotic friend then I will stop being civil to you George." She warned setting her last box on the apartment floor.

"No that isn't Gabriella," He began.

"It's okay George, no need to be shy about it." Fred teased wandering over to the couch. He approached me from behind and rested a hand on my shoulder that sent tingles through my entire body. My shoulders shivered slightly and he came around the couch to better converse. When he met my gaze, how ever, his thoughts seemed to be lost.

He gaped at me, unable to form any sort of speech. Seconds after his shell shock, his eyes were replaced with a removed sort of look as if he wanted nothing to do with the situation at hand. The room fell suddenly quiet and Alicia, unaware of my presence called out from the kitchen

"What's the matter with you Fred? Its not like you've never seen a girl before." She said walking over towards the couch, "Seriously, if I didn't know any better I'd say it was-"

Cut off sentences seemed to be a reoccurring theme when it came to seeing me. She, like Fred and George, looked at me in utter shock.

"Hey," I whispered. At this moment someone strolled through the door and noted the strange situation of our group.

"What's going on?" Came Lee's voice as he strolled into the room.

"Angelina is back."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

thanks for reading! X3

It feels a bit fast moving but I dunno…leave your thoughts at the review page!


	5. Typical For Us To Act Like This

A/N: THANKS A MILLION TO EVERYONE WHO REVEIWED. Silver Scribes, xxvisionaryxx, Chrys-Moony-Marauder, GossipGirl17, 000kayko000, Skyre, zazemi and Absternator you guys make my day! The feedback was very helpful : ) hope the great reviews will continue! Okay well down to business, I'm sorry for the wacked grammar in the previous chapter, I was using a word alternative and when I switched it into word it got a bit messed up… I'm glad that none of you think that the story is moving to quickly because it feels good to write Angelina back with the gang. This was a pretty quick update if I do say so myself, so I hope you all enjoy: )

Disclaimer: I dunno why I even bother with this thing…

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Things aren't usually like this you know. I mean most people lose touch with their old Hogwarts friends; don't have them all streaming into their apartment on a regular basis. People go to work, travel, meet new people, move forward in space. But not them, oh no, these people clung to the past. They didn't, of course, spend every waking moment reminiscing about lost youth or _remember when_s. It was like stepping into some sort of time warp, the faces had changed as I'm sure the people had, yet Alicia, Fred and Lee strolled in as if they were but a day out of Hogwarts. Needless to say, these people did not like change.

I sat uncomfortably on the couch as each on of them drilled me with their open mouths and wide eyes. I'm glad that it was George I saw first, it was like wading gradually into the water, if it had been Alicia sitting there in the Kitchen when I arrived, there would have been a splash.

"You are joking." Lee scoffed. But when I turned to face him his scoff turned into a laugh. He studied me with genuine excitement and pulled me into a hug.

"I can't believe it's really you!" He exclaimed pulling back from the hug to double check that it was in fact me. I grinned and hit him lightly on the shoulder after he flicked my ear. I then turned back towards a more harsh reality, **Fred and Alicia. **While Fred refused to make eye contact, I was beginning to realize that Alicia's glare had lost none of its potency over the years.

Alicia was part of the thing that drove me to convince Brian to let me off of work for a week. Katie and I had easily stepped back into our friendship, and despite the circumstances, I enjoyed it and found myself missing our Katie, Alicia and Angelina days. But upon seeing Alicia with her arms cross and contempt in her eyes I realized that my fantasizing about having twelve year old sleep over parties and gossiping as we used to would do absolutely no good.

The room was enveloped in a tense silence. George seemed unsure if he should say anything due to the fact that, though they had been broken up for some time no, Alicia still ruled him as a dictator rules his people. Katie was still flipping through that damn magazine and Lee was still grinning caught up in the fact that I had indeed returned. And Fred, well he seemed to making very good conversation with the coffee table in front of him.

"I've got to go – I should get these boxes back to the store." Fred said the vague expression still on his face. I held back the urge to stop him and demand that he have some sort of conversation with me and simply watched him grab the boxes and stumble out the door.

"I should go help the bloke," George relented as he stood over the window watching Fred trip down the street due to the massive boxes he was attempting to carry. He threw me a quick smile and headed for the door.

"I'll be back soon," He called "I'm trusting you all to watch Angelina, make sure she doesn't run off to _Australia_ or anything before I come back."

"**Australia?" **Lee echoed and I nodded in response.

"Sydney actually," Lee let out a whistle at this and ran a hand through his dreads.

"What the hell did we do to you?" He asked jokingly. "You have no idea how much we've missed you back here Angie. After the first year we reckoned you were gone…for good." He added in a slightly darker tone.

"So, was it easy replacing us?" Alicia questioned though there was a curiosity hidden below her icy tone.

"I didn't even bother trying," I admitted glancing at her as she moved back towards the kitchen and began shuffling the parchment on the table. Lee jerked his head in Alicia's direction encouraging me to go talk to her.

I sighed and decided it was better to get it over with now so we might actually have a chance at being friends again.

I approached the kitchen cautiously and she didn't once look up from her parchment.

"Look I can see that you're angry with me,"

"You think I'm angry?" She asked ironically, still looking at the table beneath her. "Try having your best mate leave you for a few years; maybe then you'll see that _angry _doesn't even begin to describe how it feels."

I ran a hand through my hair and gripped it firmly.

"Look, what I did…" I said my voice laced with regret, "It wasn't right."

Alicia finally looked up and met her green eyes with mine. For a moment, she collapsed, her defensive shell cracked but by the time she opened her mouth she was standing straight, shell quickly repaired. Maybe she wanted to hate me, but I don't think so. She has a right to be angry, at least for a while. But the thing about Alicia is she has this tendency to not let things go, and that worries me deeply.

"You disappeared. No letters, no goodbyes, you **just left**. There really isn't anything you can do to justify that, so I don't know what the hell you think you are doing here, but if you are trying to **just come back, **than you are wasting your time."

I held every muscle in my body very tight to keep myself from bursting out into a slur of shouts and accusations I would surely later regret. I understand where she is coming from, believe me, I would be angry too. But the fact is, I'm here and I'm trying to fix things, but she won't let me.

Part of me told me I should be bawling my yes out, kneeling on the floor begging for her forgiveness. But lets be honest, it's a lot easier to face reality when you are frustrated with it rather than upset with it because it conceals the fact that you actually are hurt, it lets you go on pretending like you are completely fine, just slightly enraged.

"Alicia, I'm trying to apologize, I'm trying to fix it," I pleaded pushing the frustration from my voice. She completely ignored me and walked over to Lee and Katie.

"I'm going out for a bit," She mumbled before grabbing her coat and exiting her apartment.

I marched over to the couch and threw myself on it in a huff of defeat.

"You failed to mention that everyone would hate my guts," I grumbled to Katie beginning to think this was all one huge mistake, I didn't belong here any more, I'd been gone to long, maybe I it would be better if I let them live their lives and I continued with mine.

But this is the thing that confuses me, I had myself so convinced that my life, my home was Sydney when in reality, this place, with out any convincing, really was my life. This was always home, and it had been home for much longer than my four story walk up and my job at the _Prophet. _

"What am I? Dirt?" Lee retorted. I rolled my eyes at him and Katie put her trashy tabloid to rest.

"Thank you Lee, but you saw Alicia just then; she's never going to let me walk into a room with out feeling like the biggest coward on the face of the earth."

"You've got to give her time Angie," Katie advised. "We were all angry at first, **you** did leave _us_."

"I should never have come," I concluded burying my face in my hands. This is my reward for letting my curiosity and longing get the best of me.

"You leave right now, and _I _will start bashing you with Alicia," I glared at Lee's smirking disposition. "But you're staying so that shouldn't be a problem." He concluded and my mock glare eased up.

"Yeah, I mean what could happen in two weeks?" I asked realizing that this might not be as bad as I've been deeming it to be. Alicia will loosen up, and hopefully so will Fred, what was I worrying about?

"Only two weeks?" Lee questioned his eyebrows raised and I nodded my head in response, "We'll see about that."

We were only a few words into conversation when George burst through the door.

"Honey, I'm home!" He shouted as he strode casually towards us.

"Why don't you **really **go home," Katie offered sarcastically rolling her eyes. George smiled and grabbed my wrist pulling me from the couch.

"Angelina, it's about time you saw London from the eyes of an adult," He informed dragging me towards the door.

"That's not fair George! We weren't done talking yet!" Lee shouted from behind us throwing George an innocent smile.

"Oh just come with us you wanker." He consented as Lee hopped up and was instantly at our side.

"Oi, wait, I'm coming too!" Katie squealed slipping into her black flats.

"Is their anyone else I'm forgetting or should we just invite all of bloody London while we are at it?" George dryly asked rolling his eyes as Katie scurried towards us.

"Nope we're all set. Where are we going?" Katie wondered as we stepped out into the crisp night air.

"The Three Broomsticks of course, where else would we take her?"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The pub was brightly lit and numerous amounts of witches and wizards sat around the small pub drinking, some in large groups laughing loudly where as others sat alone with their thoughts.

"Notice anything different about Rosemertta?" George asked with a mischievous smile planted firmly on his lips after she had left our table.

I glanced over at the waitress and bartender who was coyly smiling at a large group of middle aged wizards. Her dress was synched at the waist and fell just below her knee. Her curly hair still fell down over her face as it always had, I could notice nothing different about her except that she seemed to have put on a few pounds, but eventually who doesn't?

"Dunno, has she gained weight?" I stabbed curiously; George smirked and nodded his head.

"She certainly has gained weight," Lee confirmed smiling along with George as if they were all in on some sort of secret. I made eyes at Katie, urging her to tell me what was going on but she joined in their smirk fest.

"She didn't gain weight in the traditional way," Katie added "She hasn't been downing Bertie Bots or anything like that."

I glanced back towards the woman dropping mugs of fire whisky onto a near by table and noted that there was a firm sort of shape to her extra weight. I shook my head… that would be near impossible!

"She's not pregnant is she?" I asked voicing what I thought were only ridiculous assumptions on my part. But when I saw their smiles widen I realized that I had been correct.

"You are joking me!" I exclaimed. "With who?"

"That's the other part," Katie put in.

"It's Michael Hudson,"

"Her husband."

"Married?" I resounded at George's last statement.

"When I got the wedding invitation in the mail, I thought it was some sort of gag from his shop," Katie said motioning towards George and taking a gulp of her fire whiskey.

"Why would she invite _you _to her wedding?" I pondered glancing at Katie. Rosmertta was a good 10 years older than us and as far as I knew they had never spoken more than an _I'll have a fire whiskey thanks._ I crossed my fingers under the table and hoped that she hadn't formed some sort of underlying friendship with the flirtatious bartender.

"I work with her husband," She shrugged.

"We wanted Lee to go and spike her water, I mean it only seemed fit that she be drunk, after all she does work in a bar…"

"But Katie spoiled it," Lee whined throwing a sideward glance at Katie.

"Just because I have morals," She said defensively, taking a sip of her drink.

"I can't believe the flirty bartender is starting a family," I said in disbelief unable to keep from staring at the bartender who though was carrying a child still managed to make eyes at all the men in the pub.

"Hey isn't that Gabriella?" Lee asked looking towards the bar. George's head snapped and he smiled in recognition.

"Oi! Gabriella!" George shouted across the noisy pub. She turned around in faint recognition of her name. She scanned the tables and her dark eyes landed on George immediately brightening.

She picked up her drink and carried moved towards our table as she approached I could think only of what Katie had said to me about her _exotic Spanish girl_, because that was really the only way to describe her.

Her dark brown hair flowed past her shoulders and was set in layered waves that swept across her head. Her skin was flawlessly tanned and multiple gold bangles dangled on her wrist. She wasn't the crazy sort of exotic; she was the _gorgeous _type of exotic.

Go George! I silently cheered in my head, if he's not going to have Alicia he may as well be with the best looking girl in England…and Spain for that matter…

"Hi," She greeted, her English was laid heavily laid with a Spanish accent. George slid a chair over from the adjacent table and pulled it next to him. Gabriella took the seat and George wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"Gabriella, this is Angelina, she's an old friend," He introduced nodding towards me. She threw me a genuine smile and wave before whispering something in George's ear; he pulled his head back and shook his head. I could only guess that their incoherent whisperings had something to do with _where did this girl come from?_

"And of course you know Katie and Lee," George finished just to get the formalities out of the way. Katie smiled politely though there was an obvious disinterest in her eyes.

"Ms. Bell!" a high voice called from behind us. We saw Madame Rosemertta walking swiftly over towards our table with a letter firmly clasped in her hands. "This just came for you, said it was urgent." She said thrusting the letter out towards Katie before hurrying back to the bar.

Katie pried open the letter and read through it quickly. Upon finishing she stood from the table and slipped on her coat and threw her hair quickly up into a ponytail stuffing the parchment into her pocket.

"It's St. Mungo's," She informed pushing in her chair, "Their low on staff and a whole lot of intensive care patients just came in…I've got to go, I'll see you back at the apartment Angie,"

Lee stood as she moved towards the door and turned to me as George and Gabriella were deep into their own conversation.

"I'd better walk her there at least," He sighed "She gets a bit stressed when they call her in like this," He mumbled shrugging and rushing out the door. I sighed and came face to face with the company I was keeping. Not very engaging at all.

I glanced around the room for more interesting feats, but found none. I sighed and nodded my head when George asked a question but was really disengaged from what ever conversation they were having. My eyes settled on a table behind us, I saw through the masses of people a flash of red hair and I did a double take.

You would never believe how few red heads there are in London.

I contemplated whether or not I should approach him and soon found myself walking towards his small table. I don't want to avoid him the entire time I'm here, and we really shouldn't have to, we are mature adults, capable of dealing with confrontation.

"Hello Fred," They were the first words I'd spoken to him since I left, we'd exchanged numerous glances since my being here, and even an abrupt run in before, but this was the first time I was putting words between us.

It's a risky thing you know speaking, to let words hang in the air between us, it just makes everything more real. Thoughts can be exchanged to an extent through eye contact, facial expressions, body language, but for the most part, they remain inside your head. Once you _voice_ those thoughts, they are out there, what ever they might mean to you, or to someone else, **they are real**.

He glanced up from his drink and smiled bitterly up at me.

"Angelina! Its wonderful to see you, pull up a chair!" He cheerily encouraged gulping down a good half of his drink. I hesitantly sat down in the chair opposite him and surveyed him. His mouth was wet from what ever it was that was in the mug he was downing by the gallons, his hair was slightly messed up in the front, but really he looked exactly as I remembered him. He hadn't out grown his freckles, and his hair was as red as ever. A blue t-shirt and jeans suited his tall figure just fine. Though he was smiling, as I often remember him doing, it wasn't the playful smile I remembered. There was a sense of cynicism to him, his pried at his smile and dulled his eyes.

"I," He began slamming his mug down on the table, "so extremely happy that you have returned," He slurred bringing the mug to his face again but I pushed it back down.

"You are drunk," I informed thinking that perhaps I should have waited to approach him until he was adjusted and **sober.**

"Well spotted," He droned and quickly gulped down a rather large swig before I could stop him again. "So, did you finally tire of the people you were with and decide to return here, see if we could amuse you? Because really, its bad business to hit up the same lot of people twice," His voice had changed from the jolly, light tone it had earlier and picked up a darker, heavier air.

"I should go," I murmured sensing that this conversation was going downhill but he grabbed my arm holding me back. Of course, I could have wrenched free from his grasp in a matter of moments seeing as he was completely wasted, but for reasons beyond my comprehension, I wanted the confrontation.

"Stay, stay," He insisted. "So Angelina, care to regale us with your story,"

"I wouldn't know where to start- Look Fred, I really-"

"I'll begin for you then. I believe it starts with a girl leaving the bloke who was madly in **love** with her. Yes, that is the one, he of course had no idea where she had gone, or why she'd left, but I suppose this didn't really bother the girl because she never wrote, or bothered to come back." His voice was filled with resentment and his eyes were piercing through mine as if he could see right into me.

I was frozen to my chair; he had used the word **love.** That wasn't the sort of word that was to be thrown around lightly, and we had never done so. When we were together in Hogwarts, love was always just a word that married people said to one another, kids like us didn't fall in love; the thought never even crossed our minds. And now, he's making this _love _accusation, and I've got no bloody clue what to make of it. His eyes continued to drill into mine and he knew his words were out there, he **wanted them to be real.**

"Do you know what it's like not knowing? It is the sort of thing that eats away at you and you can't push it from your mind because it's so incomplete." He seethed. "What was so bad about your life that you had to leave and not even have the decency to write?"

"I never meant for things to go as far as they did," I defended meeting the fire in his eye with my own.

"And coming back here is the solution to all of that?" He muttered sarcastically.

"What do you want Fred? I messed up, I messed up in a really big, huge, way, but as of right now there is nothing you and I can do about it. So if you have some brilliant solution to all of this then please, enlighten me." I bit back feeling the build up of years of frustration inside of me.

"**Go home**," He spat casting aside his empty mug. I stood abruptly from the table before his words could take a toll on me. I practically sprinted towards the door not responding to George, who was calling my name in confusion.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

reviews _equal_ **updates**.


	6. I'm Not Pretending

A/N: I promised a quick update and I am so sorry to say that this took me about three weeks! I've just been extremely busy and I've got winter term exams in a week so it'll probably be a little while before I update again I'm ver sorrrrrrry. This chapter is kind of a filler, it's short and not all that great, but it is here none the less. Next chapter will be much QUICKER and LONGER and more PLOT-ISH than this : ) THANK YOU SO MUCH TO ALL THE REVEIWERS. I cannot believe how many reviews I got for the last chapter! It is so great to read your response, I hope they keep coming! Okay I've been ranting long enough I think, there you are chapter six!

Disclaimer: seriously.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I should have expected him to push me away, but my impulse drove all logic and eventually landed me back here. I was curled up on the couch in the middle of Katie and Alicia's flat with a mug of tea in my hand and a soft comforter around my body. He said **go home, **and right now that's probably what I should be doing, but I don't want to be the girl who ran away twice.

So I sat in the living room of my old flat and waited. Who or what I was waiting for I'm not sure. I just wanted somebody to come in and tell me that they want me to stay, I need somebody to want me here, or my two weeks is going to be a hell of a lot harder than I reckoned. Its easy to just leave, just go home to your empty apartment pack your things and go, but when there is actually someone there to hold onto you, to make you see what you are leaving it becomes a lot easier to stay than it is to run away. That was the problem last time, nobody was there to stop me, nobody was there to say **I need you to stay,** so I left.

And here was Fred saying **I need you to go home **and saying that he loved meThat was probably the only part of that encounter that I was hung up on. His anger and frustration is understandable, but love really wasn't in the picture when I left, so what did he think he was doing throwing that love word around when I came back?

There was always unspoken attraction between us; we cared about each other, yes, but love wasn't so given. See, love isn't the sort of thing you can go in and out of, you can chose not to acknowledge it, but it doesn't go away, you don't stop loving; that just isn't in the definition. So for Fred Weasley to use that word, he must have had some other sort of meaning to go by, because what we have is certainly not my idea of love.

I was still lost amidst thoughts of our brief encounter when I heard the door swing open. Alicia walked in and didn't seem to notice my presence until I stood up.

"Hey," I greeted grasping my warm cup of tea to my chest and throwing her a hopeful smile. She returned it with a glare and continued to ignore my being there all together as she stormed into her room. I sighed and dropped my blanket on the couch and set my mug on the table, making my way towards her bedroom.

I knocked softly at the door, not sure how she would respond and knowing another blown up confrontation was not what I needed. When she didn't respond I leaned against the door frame.

"I understand you are upset, but could you please just give me a chance?" I pleaded a hint of frustration in my voice. My eyebrows rose expectantly when she opened the door, but instead of telling me it was alright, she shoved past me making her way back towards the door.

"Am I always going to be the girl who ran away?" I asked dejectedly letting my arms hang limply by my side. She paused for a moment half way through the open door and looked at me.

"Yes," She offered almost sympathetically. She stole one last glance before she went the rest of the way through the door and I heard her crack of apparition soon after the door swung gently closed.

I leaned my head back and sighed deeply; wishing that Katie would show up any second.

The thing about Katie is that she doesn't pour the truth on you like a bucket of cold water. She gives it to you gently, painlessly, so you feel okay about it, but it is the truth none the less. Alicia dumps the truth on you and then leaves you to sort it out; she never was one to sugar coat anything.

I picked up my tea from the table realizing that Katie will have a fit when she sees that I haven't been using a coaster, and I wandered aimlessly around the room. I wanted to pop over to George's place and have a chat with him but I decided that doing that would be letting my impulses get the best of me again seeing as I'd probably bump into Fred. Plus, George and Gabriella are probably doing things in that apartment that I do not wish to see.

So I settled myself on the couch once again and picked up the magazine Katie had been reading so intently earlier and flipped through it vaguely.

By the time Katie had entered the apartment I had been through the magazine six times and my empty tea cup had formed a wet ring around her nice wooden table.

"Angelina?" She called out. I nodded my head and though she looked worn out, reluctantly came and sat next to me.

"Fred and I had a bit of a run in at the Three Broomsticks."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning greeted me with a crisp wind and a massive head ache. Katie hadn't come home until about 2:30 and by the time I actually got around to falling asleep, Merlin knows what time it was.

"Come on Angie, get out of bed!" Katie shouted rattling me in my covers. I glanced at the clock.

"You have got to be kidding me," I mumbled at eight double zero that the clock flashed. I curled myself farther underneath my covers as the window was open and blowing cool morning air onto my exposed skin.

"Come on," She insisted pulling the covers from my firm grasp. I recoiled against the air and eventually rolled into sitting up position. I threw a ratty sweatshirt over my light t-shirt and slid lethargically into the kitchen.

"Have you seen my other shoe?" She asked as she ducked down and lifted up the flap underneath the couch and slid her head around. She unsuccessfully pulled herself up.

I rolled my eyes and picked up the black flat that was lying on the ground in front of my feet and raised it triumphantly above my head.

"Here," I muttered thrusting the shoe towards her. She frowned but took the shoe and rushed towards the door slipping it on as she went.

"I'll be home around three!" She yelled as she slipped through the door. I sighed and glanced vacantly around the empty flat observing the company I was keeping. I shook my head, dissatisfied with the faint light of the early morning sun, and a new issue of _Hello! _Katie's favorite tabloid.

I sauntered into the small brightly lit bedroom and shuffled through the pile of my clothes on the floor. After I'd dressed, I began scrounging the house for something decent to eat.

I swung open the fridge door and absentmindedly braided my hair over my shoulder while letting my eyes wander over the boxes of left overs and selection of fresh fruit. I grabbed an apple and headed out the door.

Hogsmeade seemed as if it would best cure my restlessness, and I soon found myself wandering aimlessly down the busy streets of Diagon Alley. The air was cool and I shivered wishing I'd brought a sweater of some sort. The bright street was full of people hurrying to and from, so eager to finish what ever business they had in this place. But I was simply walking, no business to take care of, I was merely putting my feet to the ground and letting them carry me where they may.

I grabbed a bite to eat at a small café right next to Zonko's and after paying a ridiculously over priced bill I decided to head into the adjacent joke shop. My senses were over whelmed with yelping, and foul odors. It was the sort of shop that Hogwarts kids would come and waste a whole day lost in the pranks.

I smiled slightly to myself and walked forward. There was a large display with the words 'Dungbombs For Every Wizard' written in large purple letters. I scanned my eyes over the large shelves. There were, traditional, super, delayed every sort of dung bomb you could imagine.

I picked up one in a red box and flipped it over to read the blurb on the back which urged you to buy the product and had all sorts of moving cartoons of idea's for to use the dung bomb.

"That's over priced you know,"

I mentally kicked myself as I identified the voice coming from behind me. I shrugged my shoulders, refusing to turn around, and put the dung bomb back onto the shelf.

"Its okay, I wasn't planning on buying it anyway," I replied casually fixing my eyes on the shelves to either side of me. I walked slowly down the aisle pretending to examine each product, pretending to not notice that Fred was right behind me.

"If you came to my place, you wouldn't have to buy anything," He offered from a few paces behind me. I stopped and out turned my head so I could see him out of the corner of my eye, hands stuffed in pockets, furrowed brow. He seemed sober enough…

"I'll pass; I'm not into pranks,"

"Then perhaps you shouldn't be shopping in a joke shop," He pointed out. I closed my eyes and wheeled round so I was facing him. I tugged on one of my braids and looked questionably at him.

"Look," He sighed letting his hands fall out of his pockets and hang by his sides "Last night I was really in no condition, especially not to see you."

I raised my eyebrows in reinforcement and nodded my head slowly. He scratched the back of his head rocking back on his heels in absence of words searching my face for some sort of reaction. At this I turned around again beginning to walk towards the exit. He paused before pursuing me once more.

"Angelina," He called grasping his hand on my shoulder. As I turned around his arms fell limply downwards. "The things I said, I didn't mean any of them."

He confessed as I nodded my head urging him on. Fred glanced around the store, his eyes landing on every product the small outlet had to offer and then let his head hang back before lifting it up to meet my eyes.

"I want you to stay."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A bell jingled faintly as I stepped into Weasley Wizard Wheezes. It was smaller than the previous gag shop I'd been in, but it was over flowing with every sort of against the rules item you could come up with, filled up probably twice as much as Zonko's. There was busy movement through out the store. People dropping off large boxes, some younger kids gushed over a shelf filled with 'Wild Fire Whiz Bangs', George was at the back of the store directing the people who were dripping off the heavy boxes some where behind a half open door.

I waved to George and offered a smile. He crinkled his brow and stared at me for a moment, but was pulled away a moment later by some man wearing expensive looking robes.

I sighed and wandered vaguely around the shop crowded shop. I shifted my direction when a box sitting in the middle of the third aisle from the end caught my eye. It was a colorful array of oranges and pinks, and on the front of the box 'Patented Daydream Charms' was printed in a large curly sort of writing. Underneath the name was a picture of a young couple gazing into each other's eyes lost in romantic bliss.

I picked up the box and stared at it curiously. It was so simple, yet so ingenious. To be able to slip into a day dream, a perfect world, at will; it is everyone's wish and nobody's reality.

It would of course be a waste of time to spend my day dreaming of the peaceful oranges and pinks that laced the box, but it was awfully tempting.

"Angelina!" George called drawing me out of my thoughts. I quickly shoved the box back onto the shelf and pushed aside my thoughts plastering a smile on my face.

"Nice of you to drop by," He said to me though he kept his eyes fixed on the door.

"I suppose it was," I responded slowly looking at him curiously. He jerked his head away from the door and lowered his head.

"Look, just to warn you Fred is going to be back any minute from Zonko's," George said lowering his voice and glancing towards the door.

"No, George-"

I was interrupted by a jingle of the door. George looked at me pointedly and nudged his head towards the side of the shop.

"Well m'am I'm so glad you found what you were looking for!" He said smiling falsely and pushing me away from his twin who was striding down our aisle.

My protests were silenced when Fred was within hearing distance of us.

"What are you pushing Angelina around for?" Fred asked curiously. I shrugged and raised my eyebrows at George who then gave up on attempting to hide me and pulled Fred aside.

"Fred, considering the circumstances, I think it would be best if you left her alone." He firmly advised. Fred merely grinned and punched George playfully on the arm.

"The circumstances are fine George," He informed pushing past his brother. George simply glanced back and forth between Fred and I. I smiled and looped my arm through George's smiling up at him sympathetically.

"There will be other times George," I said smiling slightly as he rolled his eyes "You'll have your chance for valiance.

"Who says valiance is what I was after?" He retorted ducking behind the counter to grab something. "Maybe I just didn't want to get stuck in the middle of you two." He said exasperatedly pointing towards Fred and I accusingly before storming off into the back room.

"He so wanted the glory of saving you," Fred said staring at the door in which George had just departed. I grinned and clucked my tongue,

"Well he's got to be **somebody's** knight in shining armor."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I know it wasn't a great chapter, but reviews would still be lovely, even if they are saying GOD I HATE THIS SO MUCH. Its still feed back : )


	7. Baby Come On

A/N: okay so I actually suck at updating. But, I had a bit of trouble with the beginning of this chapter and I toyed around with a few different ideas but I think this best suits the story. This chapter is MUCH longer than the one before 14 whole pages! Thank you so much to thepurplesocks, Flameonurass-TruSC, TheCritic18, Chrys-Moony-Marauder, 000kayko000, Skrye, padfootloose, Nacata, and BehindBlueEyes87

Disclaimer : I'm a JK Rowling thief.

* * *

_Isn't there something familiar about me? The past is only the future with the lights on._

* * *

"Date night?"

"That's right," George replied as he crammed new gags into the front window of the shop.

"What the hell is that?" I asked handing him the last box and leaning back against an adjacent shelf crossing my arms in annoyance.

"Well," He began standing up and straightening out his robes "It's exactly what it sounds like."

I raised my eyebrows and waited for a further explanation but George only smiled and shook his head.

"You're a smart girl, you'll figure it out. I've got customers," He dismissed with a smirk before plastering on a charming smile and feeding a couple of six year olds some sort of twisted promotion of the punching telescope.

I rolled my eyes and scanned the shop for Alicia; perhaps she would fill me in on this whole date night thing. We weren't exactly on good terms, but she was looking me in the eye again, and yesterday she even said 'could you help me with these papers,' I do believe I've made incredible progress for a two day time span.

I found Alicia at the cash register flipping a coin in absence of customers.

I walked up to her slowly as if any sudden movements might set her off.

"So Alicia," I began, looking for some sort of reaction to my speaking with her. She continued to flip the coin but stood her ground, so I went on. "What is this date night all about?"

Alicia sent me a quick glare to make her point and then turned her attention back to the coin in her hand. She flipped it once and then walked swiftly to the back room.

"Okay," I said slowly to myself stepping up to the cash register. I picked up the coin that she left on the table and ran my fingers over it lightly before flipping it up in the air. I sighed as it missed the table and clunked to the floor.

I looked up to see a rather impatient looking fifteen year old had come while I had been distracted. I pressed on the coin with my foot and smiled at the awaiting buyer.

"Will that be all?"

* * *

"Can't anybody tell me what date night is?"

Katie smirked at me and picked up a pillow from the floor and set it on the couch.

"I suppose we could," She decided with a shrug. "But watching you try to guess is much more amusing."

I sighed and glanced vacantly around the room. George dismissed me from cash register duty after I accidentally gave a ten year old girl double her actual change. Numbers never were my strong suit.

Saturday's are the busiest days for the twins, so rather than higher extra employees, they bring in the whole crew to help out, save Lee who usually has to do announcing during Saturday afternoons. But the store was pretty much taken care of. George had brought in and set up all of the new products earlier, so he was doing what he liked to call 'working the customers'. Fred was negotiating with some business people out in Reading, Alicia was put back to the cash register, and it didn't seem as if there was anything left for me to do.

So, I decided to check out the twin's flat, see what a few years had done to it. When I pushed open the door I was met with the same crammed and cluttered apartment that I had left.

Katie had been sleeping on the couch; apparently she was at St. Mungo's all night last night. I did my best not to wake her, but a combination of the door closing, cupboards slamming, and my tea boiling seemed to stir her.

When I noted that the flat looked very much the same as I remember, she informed me that around here, change comes slowly; if it comes at all.

I shrugged my shoulders when she refused to supply me with some concrete information on date night. Katie smiled to herself as she placed the last cushion on the couch. I crinkled my nose and strolled over to the counter where I'd set my tea down and took a sip.

I watched as Katie glanced around the flat in disgust before beginning to pick up the assortment of dirty socks, empty chip bags, used cereal bowls, and any other disgusting article that was lying around the empty flat.

"Are you the maid?" I mocked setting my tea down on the small wooden table next to the couch and sitting down on the perfectly fluffed cushions. Katie sent me a glare and levitated a pile of garbage over to the trash.

"I don't know how anybody could live like this," She scoffed holding a piece of dark fabric that was covered in some sort of juice far away from her face

"Have you seen what's in their cupboard?" She asked letting the fabric fall to the floor and resigning to the couch. "It's filled with moldy bread and stale crackers, what a way to live eh?" She asked smiling to herself.

I sent her a knowing glare thinking of my kitchen filled with shoes and rotting fruit. Katie's laugh faded as she met my gaze

"Right," She muttered as she remembered and biting her lip she glanced out the window.

"Well," She began letting her hands fall to her thighs and pushing herself up. "I'm meeting Lee for lunch, want to come?" She offered as she moved across the room and threw on a light jacket.

I bit my lip, contemplating spending an afternoon as the third wheel to Lee and Katie's perfect relationship.

"Unless of course you prefer the moldy bread in the cupboard," She added with a smirk. I smiled back at her and reluctantly stood up taking one last sip of tea before setting it back down on the table.

"Alright let's go." I concluded with a sigh.

* * *

Katie and I flooed to a small low key restaurant right outside of London. The tables were round and the chairs were small. The room had a cramped, musty sort of feel to it. The walls were wallpapered a beige colour with a rough texture and dim light enveloped the room.

When we entered the restaurant we were greeted by an unhappy looking young witch. She led us to our round table and dropped our menus on the dusty surface as Katie and I took our seats in the small chairs.

"See Katie, if I'd stayed here, that would have been me," I pointed out lightly "Throwing menus and scrubbing dishes in a gloomy restaurant in the middle of no where."

Katie furrowed her brow and shook her head.

"This restaurant isn't gloomy!" She defended leaning back in her chair and picking up a menu. I flipped mine open and scanned over the list of lunches, after flipping through the laminated pages a few times I set it down on the table and glanced at Katie.

"So you and Lee, you have been together-"

"For about a year now." She finished. I furrowed my brow and tilted my head towards her in disbelief. When I left Katie and Lee were practically married, I assumed that that is how they stayed the entire time I was away. But apparently change does come around here, even if it is slow.

"So then," I concluded slowly, "You guys broke up and got back together?"

Katie nodded her head in confirmation and I stared at her expectantly waiting for some sort of explanation but she only returned her focus to her menu.

"What happened?" I pushed keen to know what had split Romeo and Juliet, other than of course their imminent deaths. Katie sighed and closed her menu, her blue eyes drilled into mine with simple sincerity.

"Everybody has problems," She stated with lack of any emotion in her voice. I silenced my curiosity and glanced around the restaurant.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom," I excused quickly, sliding out my chair. Katie nodded in response and I smiled weakly before turned to the back of the room.

I made my way through a series of crowded tables filled with colleagues out to lunch, and couples out on dates, until I found an old wooden door marked Witches. I pushed it open gratefully and was met by a wave of heavy putrid air.

I slid into one of the stalls whose walls were filled with graffiti from SB + CL FOREVER to Barry Shit Here. I leaned up against the cold metal wall and tilted my head back inhaling deeply. The dense air filled my lungs and brought unease to my nose, but cleared my mind.

What the hell am I doing here?

My thoughts were interrupted by the slamming of the door and wheels bumping along the unevenly tiled floor.

"Hurry it up in there!" a voice called impatiently "I've got to clean the floors,"

I exhaled loudly and swung open the door. I was met with the face of the same unhappy looking young witch who had greeted us at the door.

"Sorry," I mumbled staring at her for a moment placing her face, "You're our waitress aren't you?"

She looked at me and in her eyes I simply saw my own reflection as if there was nothing more or less behind those eyes.

"I dunno, it's not like I keep track," She grumbled slapping her mop to the floor.

"Right. Of course" I replied cringing as I dried my hands on the back of my pants and studied the mop in her hands before glancing towards the door the lead out to the restaurant. I stepped over her mop and towards the door. My hand was firmly wrapped around the rough handle bar when I hesitated and looked back at the girl.

"You don't…erm, serve the food do you?" I questioned my eyes resting on the mop in her hand.

"Hah," She let out dryly "I do everything around here lady."

With that final note I tore my gaze from the girl and exited the bathroom and walked back over to the table. While I had been conversing with the bathroom / waitress girl, Lee had shown up. They were leaned in over the table in quiet conversation.

I coughed slightly to announce my presence as I sat down. Lee's head jerked up and he immediately sent me a smile which I couldn't help but return.

"Hey Angie," He greeted lifting his glass of water. Katie rolled her eyes and took the glass out of his hand putting it firmly back down on the table.

"You know that waitress, the one who gave us our menus?"

Katie crinkled her brow and studied me with confusion but still she nodded her head in confirmation.

"Well I was in the bathroom and-"

"Angelina Johnson!?" Echoed across the small restaurant. I jerked my head up in panic. The last thing I needed was for this to turn into some huge Hogwarts reunion. I looked over to the door of the restaurant and standing in the door way was Oliver Wood.

Katie laughed smugly and muttered, "Well this should be a fun lunch," under her breath as Oliver made his way over to our table. Lee and I exchanged glances before our old Quidditch captain took the liberty of pulling up a chair.

Oliver Wood had been on the verge of insane during our Hogwarts years, but now I think I can say with confidence that he is utterly mental.

"Angie, Angie, Angie, it has been a long time my friend," He greeted cheerfully, swinging his arm over my shoulders. I forced a smile and did my best not to grimace at the hand dangling next to me. Sure Oliver Wood was extremely attractive and one of the most popular Quidditch players in Europe, but his mind had been some what tainted by 300 foot falls and aggressive reporters.

"What brings you back to England? Last I heard you were down in Melbourne," He inquired grabbing a piece of bread from the basket in the center. Lee kicked me under the table and I pushed the giggle that was creeping up my throat further into my stomach and smiled at Oliver.

"I needed to return a shirt," I answered vaguely resting my elbows on the table. Oliver nodded with satisfaction and took another large bite out of the bread.

After he had finished off the every piece of bread in the basket down to the last crumb, Oliver glanced hastily around the restaurant before turning to us with dissatisfaction.

"Where is the waitress? I'm starved?" He wondered clasping a hand to his stomach. Katie rolled her eyes and Lee waved to the annoyed looking waitress who slowly made her way over to our table.

"Yes?" She asked clearly irritated by our want of service. I stared at the girl and couldn't stop the image of myself lazily waiting on tables in a crummy restaurant from sneaking into my head.

"Angie? What are you ordering?" Lee asked pulling me out of my zone.

"Ah," I let out hurriedly flipping open my menu, "I'll just have what she ordered," I concluded pointing towards Katie. The girl collected our menus and sauntered off towards the kitchen.

"You okay Ange?" Katie asked looking at me with concern. I shook my head and crinkled my nose.

"I'm fine," I mumbled.

"You just seem a bit out of it."

I glanced back towards the waitress before turning to Katie and biting my lip.

"I dunno, it's just I can't help but think that-"

"Oi, I need a drink," Oliver shouted cutting my thought short. Katie raised her eyebrows in waiting for my answer. I glanced back at the girl as she levitated plates over to a table of what seemed to be a group of her friends and looked back to Katie.

"I'm just tired,"

* * *

"Is anybody going to tell me what the hell date night is?"

My question was met with muted laughter and the turning of backs as Katie, Lee and I walked into the twins flat to find the rest of the motley crew lounging around. Fred was sprawled out on the sofa, Alicia was leaning up against the kitchen counter and George was walking restlessly around the living room.

"You pricks still haven't told her?"

I nearly did a double take when Alicia's question rang through the room. George stopped shuffling his feet, Fred sat up, and Katie and Lee just looked a bit shell shocked. I raised my eyebrows hoping for some sort of an answer from her.

When her inquiry was met with blank stars she rolled her eyes and explained.

"Basically, Saturday nights we all go out to eat, but you must bring a date. We rotate between who gets to pick the spot." She said before turning away.

"That's it?" I asked before immediately regretting pushing my luck with Alicia.

"That's it." She said simply though a bit of the ice was back in her tone. She turned back to the kitchen and flipped open the cupboard as the rest of the group relaxed and moved comfortably into the room.

"Well, I suppose I'll just have to be an exception to the rule seeing as none of you dolts told me in time to ask any one." I huffed glaring specifically at George and Katie.

George laughed, "Who would you have invited?" He mocked. I narrowed my eyes and slipped off my coat dropping it on the arm on the couch.

"She could have asked Oliver, he had us with lunch today." Katie added with a grin.

"Oliver? As in Oliver Wood?" Fred echoed with a skeptical look and I nodded my head in confirmation, "That bloke has taken one too many bludgers to the head." He scoffed running a hand down the back of his head.

"Why would you ever in a million years invite-"

"We didn't invite him," I cut in quickly. "He just sort of popped up and ate all of our food."

George laughed, "How out of character," he muttered sarcastically.

I glanced around the room hastily, "So you are telling me that all of you have dates?" I asked hopefully eyeing each boy with interest.

"I'm afraid you're out of luck my dear," George answered patting my shoulder sympathetically. "You see Lee and Katie here are practically moving out to the country and popping out a couple of kids, and I am taking Gabriella."

I bit my lip and glanced at Fred who was sitting again on the couch. I studied him and thought; it was just one night, maybe we could be like we used to be. I pushed the thought back and forth in my head and after what seemed like decades, I let his name ring through the apartment in a weak yet curious sort of manner.

"Fred?" At this single syllable word, Katie, Lee and George grabbed Alicia and retreated to the bathroom. George was exclaiming something about this new glitter soap that he and Fred were testing out for the shop as they moved out of the room.

Fred glanced up at me and for a moment I felt the steady reassurance that things could go back. But as he opened his mouth my reassurance was shaken and crushed.

"Sorry," He breathed. "I'm going-"

"Actually," George said emerging from his hiding space holding a letter in his hand. "I wouldn't count on it."

Fred furrowed his brow in confusion and grabbed the letter out of George's hands. After quickly scanning the parchment Fred looked up at George and slid the paper in his pockets.

"You read my mail?" He shouted as George smiled and nodded his head motioning for everyone that it was safe to come out of the bathroom.

"I always read your mail." He stated matter-of-factly. Fred's eyebrows touched the ceiling as he moved in towards his brother.

"What? Since when?"

"Since we've been twins." He answered calmly grabbing Fred by the upper arm. "Its like part of the contract of having a twin, what's one is the others."

Lee snickered from behind the couch and I shot George a warning look. But he only continued to smile nonchalantly.

"Really?" Fred echoed smoothly moving closer to George "So I suppose under this contract, Gabriella is as much my girlfriend as she is yours?"

George forced a laugh and backed slowly away.

"You know what, we also have shampoo that changes your hair color in there, lets take a second look at that soap," George called to Katie Lee and Alicia before pushing them back into the bathroom.

"Your owls come in to the bathroom window?" I wondered as the door slammed shut. Fred laughed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Yeah, he's done it from day one and nobody can seem to get him to do otherwise."

I nodded smiling with amusement but my focus slid to Fred's pocket.

"So, your girlfriend cancelled?" I asked walking to the kitchen and grabbing a mug out of the cupboard and putting a heating up the water.

"She's not my girlfriend," He mumbled shoving his hand in his pocket. I shot him a questionable look, "Well, she's just- a girl who…" Upon seeing my expression he mumbled a series of never minds and returned to the sofa.

I flipped through the drawers looking for some sort of caffeinated tea.

"Well, looks like you are free for tonight then," I hinted over my shoulder as I tried the drawer nearest to the floor.

"Tea is in the-"

"Last drawer on the right," I finished pulling out an assortment of herbal and breakfast teas. I ripped open the last packet of Chai tea and dropped it into my steaming mug. When there was no noise coming from the living room, I went back and sat down next to Fred resting my tea cup on my lap.

"Come on, it will be just like the old times when we all used to sneak off to Hogsmeade on the weekends." I encouraged though subconsciously knowing it would be nothing of the sort. Fred looked at me hesitantly before standing up from the couch and looking down at me.

"I dunno if that is such a good idea," He reasoned looking me earnestly in the eye. I shook my head and joined him standing\.

"It will be fun," I sang in his ear hoping he would cave. He turned to me and looked over to the side of the room before bringing his head back to face me. I rocked back and forth on my heels as he gazed softly down at me.

"Fine,"

* * *

"So where exactly are we going?" I asked once the apartment door had firmly shut behind Katie and me. Katie pulled her blonde hair into a pony tail and picked up the tabloid that had been delivered to her window.

"Dunno, its Lee's pick tonight so we'll see," She said with a shrug flipping open the magazine. But upon seeing a blown up picture of Oliver Wood throwing the camera a cheesy smile and tossing a quaffle, she threw it on the couch.

"Who is Alicia bringing to this thing?"

"Who knows!" She huffed throwing her arms up in the air, "Alicia usually brings a different annoying ministry worker every week. It's rather monotonous really."

I nodded my head and shrugged of my jacket hanging it on the coat rack next to the door. I slid off my shoes and padded across the thick cream colored carpet scattered with nail polish and food stains here and there.

If you ask me, the only reason Katie has never moved in with Lee is because she'd risk losing the apartment. The kitchen was in the far right corner of the open sort of room that made up the majority of the apartment. Upon entering, there was a short step down in which you entered the small den which housed the couch, muggle TV which I had insisted on having when we first moved in, and a large bay window across from the couch.

It was an apartment any low paid young witch would only dream about and somehow we had snagged it. This apartment is the only thing holding Katie back from marrying Lee on the spot and moving out of the country I reckon.

I put my thoughts on hold for a moment as I remembered what she had said at lunch and her refusal to delve into the details. Curiosity tugged at my lips and pried them to put thoughts into the air that should have stayed in my mind.

"What happened between you and Lee?"

She took the question in slowly, digesting it word by word, and after a few moments she faced me, regret laced her face. She tilted her head back and I watched her eyes trace the cracks on the ceiling.

"Things happen Angelina." She informed in a low tone I rarely heard from her. "A lot more than 'date night' has changed since you've been gone."

"Everybody wants to know what I've been up to, where I've been but what about the rest of you? Don't I get any answers? I've been in Sydney, what's your excuse?"

I couldn't stop the words from coming out, I opened my mouth just a crack and a bomb spilled out. I snapped my jaw the moment I finished not wanting to see the consequences and shook my head retreating to my room.

* * *

I laid on my bed with my stomach down and I stared between my bag and my pile of clothes running it through my head whether or not I should just go home and erase London from the map completely.

About 45 minutes ago, Lee had popped in to bring Katie. After that I owled Fred and told him I'd just spent the past half an hour throwing up and would be unable to go to date night. I figured the throwing up was a good excuse, because it would guarantee that he stayed away, didn't come prodding around here.

As I sat in a lull of emotion there was a pop in the living room. I rolled my self off of the bed and opened the door to see Fred standing in the middle of the room.

"Fred?" I asked as I let the door swing open fully. He turned and smiled moving towards my room.

"What are you doing here? Didn't you get my letter?" I asked tracing my stomach remembering the sick card I was supposed to be playing.

Fred raised his eyebrows and laughed dryly sitting down on the bed next to me.

"It hasn't been that long Angelina," He reminded with a knowing look. I sighed to myself and dropped my arms in defeat. "Did Katie actually buy the throwing up thing?" He wondered aloud scanning the apartment for a sign of my roommate.

"She didn't have to," I muttered toying with the edge of the sheet. "We got in a bit of a row,"

Fred nodded slowly but pressed the matter no further. I leaned back so I was side ways against the head board.

"Sorry I've ruined your night," I apologized earnestly. I really was sorry, tonight would have been fun, a taste of what used to be. But it seems that since I've returned to London, my old 'drown in my own self-pity' habit has crept on me and forced me to lie on my bed pondering my intentions.

"Actually, I've been looking to get out of date night since it started," Fred laughed. I raised an eye brow questioning the truth in that statement, but he nodded right along.

"Well," I began clapping my hands together, "The friends go away and the claws come out," I teased playfully.

"Hey, after two years of annoying dates and dull restaurants I deserve a night off."

I shrugged my shoulders and slumped down further against the head board.

"Two years, huh?"

"Ever since Alicia dumped George," He answered, when he stole a glance at my grin he added, "Well, we had to do something to get him out of the house," to his defense. My giggle cued Fred to spread his grin into laughter at the expense of his brother.

When the laughter and the grins faded, a blanket of silence enveloped the room. It wasn't uncomfortable, but it wasn't an easy silence either. It was the sort of quiet where you are both thinking of all the things that should be said; all the things that haven't been said that are hanging over your heads like storm clouds waiting to burst.

Fred tore his eyes from the floor and came to rest on my face. I stared back for a moment before biting my lip and turning awkwardly away.

"Angelina, I can't look at you with out wondering," He said releasing the thoughts from his mind. "With out needing to know why,"

I looked at him sadly wishing I could produce a satisfying answer. For a few moments my mind wandered through our last days at Hogwarts to my moving to Sydney and could think of nothing I could conjure up as a liable excuse.

"There was this waitress today when Katie and I went out to eat," I began hoping to clarify at least something for Fred and myself for that matter. "She must have only been a year or two younger than me, and there was really nothing extraordinary about her. She was just another unhappy face in the crowd. But, for some reason I couldn't stop seeing myself as that waitress." I admitted furrowing my brow in thought "Is that what I would have become had I stayed? Destined to clean bathrooms and throw menus onto dimly lit tables?"

"Of course not," He answered immediately though the speed of his answer did not offset the instability of his tone.

"Do you know that?"

Fred's gaze flickered as he ran a hand roughly through his hair and rose to his feet.

"What do you say we grab something to eat?"

* * *

For the second time that day I found myself waiting to be served in a shabby sort of restaurant. Though, this small Italian eatery was much improved from the first.

There were small tables and chairs in the middle of the room, and against the walls were many maroon plush leather booths. Fred and I found ourselves in such a booth as we watched the band in to the far end play while a few couples swept across the small cleared dance floor.

"Not bad for an Italian restaurant," Fred noted scanning his menu. I nodded and glanced down at mine. After a moment or so a waitress came to take our orders and collect our menus. I smiled gratefully at her and watched her walk away.

"Now that you've mentioned it, I could definitely see you wiping down tables," Fred joked mock inspecting me. I rolled my eyes,

"Hey, if you make me regret telling you that-"

"Alright, I get the picture," He exclaimed silencing my threat. I nodded my head once with satisfaction and sipped my water quietly.

"Want to dance?" Fred asked motioning to the vacant floor.

"Are waitresses allowed to dance with customers?" I asked with a small smile. Fred raised his eyebrows up and down and stood up extending his hand to me.

"Well, we will just have to find out won't we?"

I took his hand and let him lead me across the room. I rested my hands behind his neck and he lightly held my waist. The slow melodic sounds pushed us back and forth steadily.

I leaned my head in against his shoulder and tried to stop my stomach from doing cartwheels around my abdomen. Needless to say, they did not cease.

It took every inch of will power I had in me to lift my head off of his chest and hold its own. I stared up at Fred and our eyes met and in one look, we said more than I could in an hour. But as our lips collided I wished I had kept my head on his shoulder.

It was wrong; I was leaving, this couldn't be forever. But in those few glorious moments, everything I had lacked and needed for the past three years had been restored. For a brief time, the world faded to a perfect black and white; he was Fred Weasley and I was Angelina Johnson: _this was the way things were supposed to be._

* * *

Hate it? Love it? **Review it.**


	8. A Tale of Bad Goodbyes

Soo, its been a while, infact while I was gone, I think I may have gotten a few grey hairs. Ahaha okay enough with my lame pathetic sense of humor, I'M SORRY ITS TAKEN SO LONG FOR THIS CHAPTER TO COME OUT, I'm really horrible at updating, I need to take some sort of course…

I hope you will all forgive me and read the chapter, it took me…would you buy all of three months?

disclaimer : you know the deal.

--

There have been times when I've stepped out of my body, and paused for a moment to see what I've be come. See if the person I am is the same as the person I would like to be. Often accompanied with these outer-body experiences, is the sensation that I'm a complete stranger to myself.

As I stood in the arms of Fred Weasley, in the middle of a stingy restaurant filled with gloomy waitresses and middle aged witches, I had no clue who I was.

England wasn't home, Fred wasn't mine and there was regret burning in my stomach.

My heart raced as I pulled away from Fred. I felt his hand release my back and I backed away from him. His face was wrought with uncertainty as he ran a hand through his hair and gripped it firmly.

I smiled weakly to myself and turned to walk swiftly towards the entrance.

"Don't do this Angelina," He called as his long strides caught up with mine. I ignored his presence at my side and exited the restaurant getting out my wand to apparate back to Katie's.

"You can't always run away," He barked letting the door slam closed behind him. I glanced at him before turning back around.

"I should never have come back," I admitted dejectedly. Fred furrowed his brow in frustration.

"Why, because we kissed?" He asked incredulously throwing his hands up in the hair. His hair was sticking up in the wrong places because of the way he had taken to gripping it and his face was red with hostility.

"No- Well, yes… I mean it's partly – I really don't feel like going into this right now, especially not with you," I muttered as a couple came out of the

restaurant and turned to see what all the commotion was.

"You do not get to disappear for four years and come back to make excuses." He whispered as an elderly woman emerged from the door behind us. I turned away from him wand in hand and with a pop I was back in Katie's room.

I collapsed on the bed and sighed deeply. But my silence was disrupted when moments later there was another crack.

"And you are back to running away," He added more calmly than before as I exited the room and walked into the empty kitchen.

"And you are back to following me,"

He snickered and leaned up against the kitchen counter. I put a kettle on the counter opposite him and pulled out a tea bag. Mug in hand I glanced down at the floor my eyes flickering up wards for seconds at a time.

The heat of our earlier argument had faded, and a tense silence hung between our separate sides of the white tiled kitchen floor.

"What are you so scared of?"

I bit my lip and met his gaze earnestly. There were a million things to be said, a million things that _should _be said. But my mind couldn't seem to form coherent sentences as my breath came in sharp staggered intervals.

"I can't breathe when I'm around you,"

Before I had time to regret those last words, Fred had closed the gap between us. Before I had time to run away, he was kissing me. Before I had time to allow my sense to kick in, I was kissing him back.

--

My restless legs could not find sleep. I turned and fussed in the darkness, but was still unable to find comfort on my twin mattress. I turned over again, my small bed feeling ironically empty.

I sighed heavily blowing a few strands of dark hair out of my face. I glanced at the clock on the wall; but the darkness made our old clock impossible to read.

After another couple of minutes of agitated twisting and turning I swung my feet onto the soft carpet and padded blindly across the room. I suppressed a groan as my toe jammed into the closed door.

I opened the door softly and breathed a sigh of relief. I wandered over to the large window that overlooked the London streets below.

The living room was dimly lit by moonlight and by the comings and goings of the street below: Headlights, street lamps, clubs, and shops.

I stared down and watched the people who seemed to flood the sidewalks below. They all had something to do, someplace to be even at this late hour, which is only an assumption on my part due to our out dated analog clock.

As I lost myself in the deafening silence and the fusion of lights below I was reminded of London my first time around.

I remembered crowded streets and dimly lit rooms, I remembered loud music and rainy Quidditch matches, I remembered cluttered floors and dirty dishes, I remembered quiet nights and restful silence, I remembered Fred's arms and always being in them.

I turned briefly from the window to steal a glance at the couch.

Tonight had felt so right, so familiar.

My hands lost in his hair, his arms wrapped protectively around my body.

Somehow or other we had managed to maneuver our way over to the couch, I can't remember it at the time, but I think I must have bumped my knee in the process; I can feel a large bruise forming.

I only tore my face from his when a whoop from Lee came from the doorway. He grinned at me wiggling his eyebrows up and down suggestively. Fred did not turn around to great our guests and I could feel his chest grumble with suppressed objection.

Katie had jabbed Lee in the rib and then studied our position on the couch with confusion. It was only then did I realize how awkwardly and uncomfortably we were situated. One of my knees was bent up against the side of the couch, and the other was draped oddly across Fred's lap.

I rolled off of him with mild embarrassment but he wrapped his arm around my waist and kept me pulled into him. I embraced the closeness and rested my head on his shoulder pushing all thoughts of consequence to the very deepest point in my subconscious; hoping they would never surface.

Things were as I remembered them as Katie and Lee poked fun at Fred and I, while I blushed and Fred cracked jokes.

Tonight, things had felt comfortable. Katie had dismissed our earlier row and we chatted aimlessly after she kicked Lee and Fred out.

Lee had grumbled something about 'We should be living together again..,' but Katie heard this and made an effort to force the door shut faster and with more force behind him.

I sighed leaning up against the cold class of the window letting my thoughts of the night settle. Once my mind had emptied, uncertainty began to coarse through my veins.

I wasn't quite sure any more where Fred and I stood. When I left my messy Sydney apartment, I had no intention of staying. So to allow myself to sit in his warm protective arms should have felt wrong, but it's been so long that I can't feel anything but right when I'm near him.

But now, staring at the empty living room, righteousness did not evade me so easily. I felt the uneasy clench in my stomach as I thought into my future.

I have a life back in Sydney; my life in England ended long ago.

My heart was torn. Twisted between what I wanted and reality.

I wished, for the first time in many years, that I had never left England to begin with. But my reality made staying in England for any extended amount of time an impossibility.

Because the fact of the matter is: I did leave. I left in the worst way someone can leave. I picked up and moved, erased it all from my mind and started over. No evidence, no goodbyes; a way that makes it impossible to come back.

I winced at the memory of this same dark, cold apartment on the night I left. No one to stop me, no one to hold me back, no one to need me.

As the cars skidded on the street below, and Katie mumbled something from her bed, I wished with every fiber of my being that this was all some perverted dream and that I would wake up in the morning, four years younger.

The light pelting of rain on the window reeled me from my nostalgic state. My head was spinning slightly, I wasn't quite sure what the right thing was any more.

Part of me wanted to stay here forever, live above the joke shop with Fred and forget I ever left. But things just aren't that simple.

I need to return to Sydney. And if I stay much longer here, I don't think I'll be able to leave. If I allow myself to be with Fred again, I wouldn't be able to leave.

Then that word that Fred had tossed into the air during our first feud slid into my vision.

Love.

I'm not sure if that's what we have, or if we ever had it. We care about each other, but to say I was in love with Fred was risky business.

Love blurs the line between right and wrong and erases everything else; I do not need blurry right now.

I sighed, my breath fogging up against the frigid glass as I knew what had to be done. I turned away from the window and retired to my bed, careful not to stub my toe on anything as a crawled under the covers of my warm down sheets.

--

I jolted awake, sitting straight up in my bed, a rush of false adrenaline pumping through me. I squinted my eyes into the early morning light and tried to grasp the dream that had sent me plunging into reality. I closed my eyes and tried to remember, but I could remember nothing except the horrible feeling it had left in my stomach.

My silent thoughts were interrupted by the clicking of the door opening. I opened my eyes abruptly to find Katie standing before me looking frazzled.

"We need to talk, quickly," She breathed frantically. "Alicia's mum is here,"

My eyes widened with a mixture of fear and surprise. Mrs. Spinnet always had a way of making sure her visits were not predictable. I felt myself revert to habit as I automatically hopped out of bed and pulled my covers up anxiously attempting in vain to neaten my side of the room.

"Do you remember what we used to do?"

I nodded cautiously as I picked up my clothes that seemed to be scattered across the room and shoved them into various drawers.

"Well, we pretty much still do that," She explained though her tone implied that there was additional information that had yet to be revealed.

"Except?" I asked expectantly raising my eyebrows.

Katie grimaced and picked up a pair of shoes, shoving them into the closet.

"Except, our little white lies, have…evolved" she said discarding her white t-shirt for a blue blouse.

"Evolved?" I asked tentatively not quite sure that I wanted the answer.

Katie forced a smile and made eye contact with me for a couple of seconds before focusing on remaking my bed.

"You remember how everything was before you left?"

I gulped and nodded my head slowly as a sinking feeling in my stomach told me what was coming.

"Well, Mrs. Spinnet remembers that too. In fact, the only reason Alicia is allowed to keep living here is because she believes you never left."

My jaw dropped, I had expected something of this sort, but she didn't even know I left?

"Please," Katie pleaded and I knew with out questioning what she was asking. She wanted me to charm Mrs. Spinnet, to play the part of the person I used to be.

I bit my lip, in a sense; this day was everything I'd hoped for: a chance to go back in time, and relive my better days. The idea was more than tempting, but I'm not sure that I would be able to pull myself out of the alternate universe that we were about to create.

Katie sensed my hesitation and sighed.

"You know you were always her favorite," She flattered and I couldn't hold back a smile.

"Hey, you were the one she worshipped,"

Katie smiled nostalgically for a moment, before frowning towards the floor.

"Well, my reputation since then has been somewhat tainted," She mumbled.

I searched her eyes curiously, but they held nothing except vague remorse. I decided not to press the matter as she smoothed out my bed.

I sighed contemplating the offer at hand. And after a moment's deliberation, I slipped into some casual pants and a t-shirt.

I put my selfish contradictions aside and opened the door into the living room, which, I might add, was much cleaner than it had been last night.

As I approached the couch I could see only the back of her graying head. I walked slowly trying to prepare myself for the woman I was about to surrender the rest of the day to. I breathed heavily; perhaps she was not as I remember…

Alicia sat in a chair opposite her, her sprits rising significantly as I entered into her view. Katie was bustling about the kitchen attempting to throw together some sort of acceptable breakfast while Lee watched her, amusement dancing in his eyes.

"Look Mum," Alicia urged desperate for some sort of escape.

Slowly, deliberately, Mrs. Spinnet turned to face me.

Her wrinkles and tightly drawn forehead, and skeptical eyes bombarded me with an onrush of vivid memories.

Her popping in to make sure Alicia wasn't doing anything she ought not to be doing, her inspecting our rooms, and asking us questions that were much too personal for her to be asking. Her disregard for all boundaries, her rules, our censored laughter flooded back to me, nearly knocking me off of my feet.

I forced a smile and shoved my hands into the pockets of my pants.

"Good morning Mrs. Spinnet," I reminded myself to say things that were plainly neutral and to simply go along with what ever she rambled about.

"Angelina," She said my full name, annunciating every syllable to perfection as she studied my figure. Her short figure only reached my shoulder, but her scowl was intimidation enough.

After assessing me she furrowed her brow and pursed her lips

"Your posture has not improved much since we last met," She noted disapprovingly. "Don't they stress that sort of thing when you go to all of your business meetings."

Business meetings? I screamed inwardly, they could have at least given me a better false career.

"Well," I began stealing a glance at Lee who was near hysterics, "We sit down, you know, during the meetings, and my sitting posture is actually quite nice."

She smiled slightly for a moment but then pursed her lips again.

"Well, that is very well indeed,"

I sighed satisfied that she had believed my lame rambling.

"Where is that boyfriend of yours? He always seems to be hanging around this place," She questioned looking around the apartment.

I bit my lip and forced my body to respond accordingly.

"Oh he's-"

"Mrs. Spinnet!" Was the shout that interrupted me from the door. I turned to see Fred stroll in in his usual causal stride, not even attempting to feign composure.

Mrs. Spinnet turned to face him and frowned, Fred was always her least favorite of the six of us, probably due to his being the most reckless.

"Frederick," She acknowledged. His smile beamed as he walked briskly over to stand beside me. I stiffened as he draped his arm across my shoulders.

The movement was painfully effortless, like he'd been doing it all his life.

"What brings you to London?" He asked in jest, but she lacked his simple humor.

Mrs. Spinnet scowled at him, but he remained unphased as he toyed aimlessly with my hair.

"To visit my daughter," She responded promptly turning away from us towards the kitchen.

I heard Katie swear loudly and then a cracking resounded through the apartment and I assumed something fairly valuable had just been dropped.

I rolled my eyes as Mrs. Spinnet galloped towards the kitchen, but Alicia stopped her.

"Let's go out for breakfast Mum," She insisted, pulling her mother out the door.

Once the door had closed everyone present seemed to exhale in unison.

Katie began at once working on fixing what ever it was that had been destroyed and I turned warily to face Fred.

"Can we talk," It was a statement more than a question.

"I had a feeling this was coming," He groaned, though a smile was still plastered firmly on his face.

I shrugged his arm off of my shoulder halfheartedly and dragged him into my room shutting the door firmly behind him.

I sighed feeling the four pale walls beginning to close in around me. I focused very hard on a patch of Katie's perfectly made bed and attempted to collect my thoughts. I scrambled words in my head, not knowing how to say this, not wanting to say this. After a few moments passed I could feel Fred's gaze drilling into mine and I could only force out a few words.

"I'm leaving,"

He furrowed his brow and reached for my hand, but I recoiled.

"I cannot stay here," I breathed

Fred's stare was vacant and surprisingly calm. His mouth was void of any emotion, the grin had faded into a thin line.

I closed my eyes and tried very hard not to think about what I was saying, I forced my heart into logistics.

A cool breeze blew in from the slightly open window and the crisp air numbed my senses.

"I can't do this," I added motioning between us. Fred tried to conjure up a laugh, but it came out as a scoff.

"You were the one who wanted this," He pointed out taking a few steps closer to me, his two strides covering nearly half of the room. I blinked my eyes a few times wishing I hadn't urged him to indulge in "the old days".

My heart once again felt as though it was ripping in half, like only one part of me can survive in this world.

"I warned you this was a bad idea." He said softly as he moved right up against me, his chin resting on the top of my head. "I can't just stop now,"

My pulse was beating hard against my body and I was sure that he could hear it.

"Exactly," I exhaled into his chest.

"What do you want Angelina?" He whispered in my ear.

The question echoed and reverberated in my mind and the horrible tearing feeling from last night crept back into my chest. My head was spinning, my mind was racing as I pulled hastily away from his grasp.

My eyes searched the room frantically, hesitation lacing each blink, but his gaze ensnared mine much too quickly.

"I just want things to be right again, but I can't belong to two worlds, there is no way-"

"No," He interrupted shaking his head, "Forget circumstance," His tone was steady, comforting and it was drowning out all my worries. "What do you want?" He asked again staggering each of the words for emphasis.

I bit my lip and closed my eyes in a failed attempt to just erase the world outside of this room, to forget what was waiting for me out there and just see this.

I furrowed my brow in lame confusion and shook my head slowly.

"I don't know,"

I managed to push the words before I mumbled an incoherent slur of apologies and escaped the room.

I walked quickly through the living room, my path: the door. I could feel the curious gaze of three other people but did not hesitate to run out of the building.

--

Outside the air was cool.

I took several deep breathes letting the crisp air cleanse my mind and refresh my body.

The bench I found myself on was old, wooden, and one of the few things that hadn't changed since I'd left London. The damp wood molded to my clenching fist and the rusting metal offered a familiar distraction.

As I sat on this bench, letting my thoughts wash over me and argue inside my head, I realized that I didn't take an outer body experience to realize that I don't know who I am.

Angelina Johnson was confident, sure of her self, never second guessed a decision.

This girl, well, she was a mess to say the least.

I sighed watching a group of children chase each other around the small field while their mothers stood idly by.

There were four kids, they looked to be about seven or eight years old. The three girls were clad in bright colors and warm jackets, their cheeks were flushed a bright red from the exercise, and the cool air I'd imagine.

I gazed wistfully at them wishing it was still that simple.

I had longed for my freedom, my adulthood, and once I got it, I ruined it.

Then I came back and massacred it I though darkly to myself.

"Is this seat taken?"

A soft familiar voice pulled me from my thoughts.

I glanced up quickly covering my utter shock with a smile and shook my head.

And for the first time since I'd been back, Alicia smiled at me. Not the contempt laced smirk, or the pitiful grin, this was a genuine smile.

I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye unsure of what her pretense was and whether I was allowed to talk. When her eyes did not catch mine, I let my gaze settle back down on the three girls who were now involved in a game of tag.

After several moments, Alicia turned to me and smiled again, a bit more cautiously this time.

"Thanks," She said toying with a button on her sleeve, "For this morning, I know it wasn't easy,"

And that was all that needed to be said. She gave no apology and I expected none, it wasn't in Alicia's nature to say I'm sorry.

And so, my mind was cleared of worry, for the time being.

I know I've been horrible with updating but please review whether you liked it or not! X3


	9. Running to Stand Still

"Its not as if I hated you," Alicia clarified, "I just hated the fact that you thought you could come back after four years an

A/N: okay, so this was a pretty quick update right? Anyway, this chapter is very short, and I apologize for that, but I didn't want to go ages with out posting again and I'm leaving for North Carolina tomorrow morning so I wanted to get this out before I left. It's a bit rubbish but, please read and enjoy!

Disclaimer: Harry Potter will never ever ever be mine.

--

"Its not as if I hated you," Alicia clarified, "I just hated the fact that you thought you could come back after four years and everything would be okay."

We were walking now, along the leaf cluttered path that encircled the park. I kept my gaze focused on my shoes which were scuffling noisily across the faded gravel. Alicia heaved a sigh and I could feel her studying my face; I kept my gaze downwards more forcefully than before.

"You don't realize what chaos you caused when you took off," Her voice was forceful and bitter now, I could tell I was treading on fragile grounds. I inhaled sharply not wanting to imagine what had happened; the things that had been said when I left.

I stuffed my hands into the pockets of my pants and lifted my head slowly, the wind whipping strands of my untidy brown hair into my face.

Alicia's eyes were hard now, concealed. I bit my lip, it was all I could do to keep myself from shouting out: "Its not fair!". Because it wasn't fair, she couldn't put this remorse on me, not if she had known what a mess I had been. I wanted to tell her, to shout at her, make her see my side. But I knew that would rip to shreds what ever delicate amends we had.

Alicia seemed to sense my frustration, because she slowed her pace and fought desperately for the eye contact I was avoiding.

I reluctantly looked up to meet her green eyes.

The hostility I'd dreaded wasn't there; instead there was honest, pity, raw sympathy.

"I am sorry that you left,"

I closed my eyes and smiled bitterly to myself. We both knew, that whatever _absolution_ I sought, what ever forgiveness I was granted would _never restore what was._

Time, which comes to spoil everything, has taken the past from me. Now, I can never get it back, only through memories. Painful memories that I'd spent years trying to erase.

Regret is a scary emotion.

It sends your stomach into your throat, and your mind into overdrive as you attempt to relish every detail you can evoke. And when the smallest of elements escapes your memory, your heart plummets and you are sent into the dismal realization that you weren't ready to let go of those details.

Now, here is the scary part.

**There is absolutely nothing you can do about it.**

Sure, perhaps a few things can be reconciled, relationships mended. But you can never regain what was: the precious, incommunicable past.

"You think I'm completely wasting my time here?" I asked pleadingly.

"Well that all depends on what you are trying to do. Are you trying to reconcile the past, or move into the future?"

And suddenly, in a wave of raw emotion, I had the answer. It wasn't the answer to Alicia's question, but it was the answer I'd been unable to find since I'd arrived; mostly because I didn't want to find it.

For an instant, I gained clarity.

And then, it was gone.

--

It was five blocks from the park to Alicia's flat, I could've easily apparated over, but in my haste, such knowledge evaded me.

I sprinted the distance, my white flats treaded harshly on the pavement below. I was pumped with adrenaline, for the first time since arriving here, I had an answer.

Perhaps not all the answers, but at the very least I had this one truth.

When I reached the apartment building, I burst through the door, forgetting to consider our guest.

"Angelina, so nice of you to join us,"

I closed my eyes to keep them from rolling automatically.

"You didn't happen to see my daughter while you were out did you?"

I can safely say that I would wish upon no daughter a mother such as Mrs. Spinnet.

Something about the moment, her disapproving frown, her cynical eyes, my adrenaline rush installed in me a confidence I hadn't felt in years.

I stopped in my path to the bedroom door, and turned to face her. In a moment of defiance, and self assurance I smirked and let loose the words that could possibly unleash all of satan's fury upon me.

"Just bloody shut up will you?"

The last syllable had not left my tongue and I was already deep in regret. She was Mrs. Spinnet, and I just told her to shut up.

Not only did I tell her to shut up, I swore at her! God damn it, what in the hell have I done.

Her dark malicious eyes widened with newly ascertained disapproval. Her tightly drawn mouth was on the verge of speech, yet she seemed at a loss of words.

My mind raced, I wondered if I should apologize, yet that would only be foolish, for apologies are weak in Mrs. Spinnet's book, but to not apologize would be disrespecting her.

I met her gaze searching for some sign, some preface of what was to come. When she finally spoke, a smile laced her lips.

"It's about time one of you fools stood up for yourselves."

For an instant I saw Mrs. Spinnet in her youth, before the woes of adulthood had turned her into an overprotective grouch, but as her heels clicked severely on the kitchen tiles the image was lost and my mission was reinstated.

I paused when I reached my bedroom door and pushed it open gently, unsure if he was even still in the apartment.

He was.

"Fred," I called hesitantly. He turned and smiled warily at me, a smile which I could not return.

"It wasn't over." I blurted out. His brow wrinkled in confusion as he strode slowly towards me.

"Do you remember what you told me the first night I was back?" I asked cringing inwardly at the memory. Fred shook his head and grimaced.

"It's not a night I like to remember," He muttered bitterly.

"You told me that not knowing was the worst feeling in the world, that it could tear a person apart."

He nodded vaguely; his tall figure was slumped against Katie's headboard. I took a breath and continued.

"That's why I cam back. It would have torn me apart, not knowing what could have been; Lee, Katie, Alicia, George…us."

I scanned the familiar features of his face and it brought strength and reassurance to my voice this time,

"It wasn't over."

Three swift strides closed the space between us as my body was pressed tightly up against his. I savored the embrace and warmly nuzzled my face into his shoulder. I could feel his chest rising slowly up and down and his warm breath in my hair.

I pulled my head up to smile at him and whisper,

"This is what I want,"

Within seconds, my smile melted as his lips met mine. I could feel his smile in the kiss and wrapped my arms tightly around his neck. And so we remained in the middle of the room, and though our actions were of no consequence to the streets below, I couldn't help but feel slightly more at ease with the world. As if all my problems had dissolved the moment his lips touched mine.

--

reviewsequalupdates! Leave me some loveeeeee (or hate if you'd like)


	10. Intermission? and appologies

A/N: hey guys, so I know that you guys have probably abandoned this story by now because it literally been months since I updated, but I wasn't gone with out good reason this time, my computer crashed and I lost a lot of files that weren't backed up. SO, don't think that I'm done with fanfiction, my computer started malfunctioning the end of August and I've only just fixed it. So, for anybody who cares, I am not gone and this story isn't finished. I promise I'll update as soon as I write this next chapter, which may take a week, but it will be up! THANKS SO MUCH for sticking with me even though I haven't been around in a while: ) you guys are made of awesome.

Lots of love (and quick updates!)

livyluwho


End file.
